


Dear Brother: A Dear Evan Hansen and Be More Chill Stepbrothers AU

by Gpuppylover7



Series: Musical Stepbrothers AU [1]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Actually like what tags am I supposed to put here???, Connor is a disaster gay™, F/F, Imagine if Jared went emo like how wild would that be, Jared kinda goes emo at one point (jk but still...), M/M, Most of the squip squad are only there during phone calls so I’m sorry, Musicals, Possibly the most ambitious crossover since Infinity War, Theatre, Treebros, boyf riends - Freeform, stepbrothers au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-09-28 06:25:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 33,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17177627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gpuppylover7/pseuds/Gpuppylover7
Summary: Mrs. Hansen and Mr. Heere got married, so Jeremy and Evan are stepbrothers. They are about to start a new school year at Evan's school. Their parents want them to get along and be friends, but they barely talk to each other. At least Jeremy has Michael. Evan has... well, he'll find someone. Hopefully.Also, I didn’t come up with this AU! I saw some pretty dope artwork done of it, and I kinda fell in love.





	1. A New Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, uh, so basically this whole thing takes place after BMC, and starts when DEH would. Also, I changed it so that the BMC plot takes place in Jeremy’s sophomore year instead of his junior year (for plot reasons, okay?). Anyways, that’s about all I gotta say right now, so yeah.

It was the start of a new school year and Evan Hansen couldn't say he was excited. No one really liked him, and it was nerve-wracking talking to new people. His closest friend, Jared, barely even talked to him. And classes would be... Well, he just hoped he didn't get called on.

"Evan?" Heidi Hansen entered the room. Evan glanced up from his laptop. "How are you?"

"N-nervous," he stammered, "I-it's going to be awful, mom."

"Evan, can we try to have an optimistic outlook?" Evan still looked uneasy so she pushed, "Have you tried writing one of those letters to yourself? Dear Evan Hansen, Today's going to be a good day and here's why... They're going to help you build your confidence! Besides, honey, this year is going to be different."

It certainly would be. Evan knew that much. "Well, I started one."

Heidi patted him on the back and smiled in approval. "Well, I have breakfast ready. Could you wake Jeremy up?"

Evan nodded and got up. This was going to be a very different year.

Evan's mom and Mr. Heere had gotten married a few weeks ago, which meant Evan and Jeremy were stepbrothers. Although they had known each other for awhile, they didn't really talk much until the wedding. Heidi thought it would be good for Evan and Jeremy to get to know each other, become friends, but Evan hadn't talked to Jeremy a lot. At least not yet. He was going to soon though, in fact, he had made a list of all the things he knew about Jeremy in preparation so he didn't say something wrong and screw something up.

1\. Jeremy was one year younger than him. He was starting his junior year today. But even though Evan was older, Jeremy was the taller of the two. This made Evan feel a little uncomfortable since his little brother was taller than him, but most people were taller than him, so he supposed it wasn't too big of a deal.

2\. Jeremy got into some sort of trouble at school last year. Something big went on, but Evan didn't know what. That was why he moved and was going to Evan's school instead of the other way around. Evan decided this was a good thing, since this meant he could still see Zoe Murphy, but he was still curious what happened at Jeremy's school.

3\. Jeremy had a best friend, Michael. Michael had moved with Jeremy... well not with him. They weren't living together or anything. Evan wasn't quite sure why Michael moved though. Not that he cared, Michael seemed nice enough. He always wore a big, red hoodie and he had a pac man tattoo. Plus, sometimes when he and Jeremy played video games, he would ask Evan if he wanted to play too. Evan thought this was nice, but he didn't really play video games, and since Jeremy and Michael played all the time... He didn't want to mess up in front of them.

Evan walked across the hall to Jeremy's room. He hesitated, should he knock on the door? It was closed, did that mean his step brother didn't want anyone coming in? He didn't know Jeremy well enough to tell. His mom asked him to get him up... should he just go in or... Evan braced himself and quietly knocked. No answer.

"J-Jeremy?" He called. "Are you awake?"

Nervously, Evan pushed open the door. Jeremy sat in the back of the room, hunched over the computer on his desk. "Jeremy?" Evan asked again. Jeremy didn't respond. Evan walked closer until he was practically right behind him. "J-Jeremy?"

Jeremy made a squeaking noise, before spinning around in his chair, quickly slamming his computer shut. He looked panicked. When his eyes landed on Evan he calmed down though. "Oh, Evan, it's just you. You scared me."

"What were you watching?"

Jeremy responded too quickly with a fast, "Nothing!"

"Well, mom wanted me to wake you up." Evan informed him. "I-if you want to," he quickly added.

"Oh, um, thanks, Evan," Jeremy said with a smile. Evan smiled awkwardly in response, still wondering what Jeremy was watching. Oh well. Even if he didn't like school, he didn't want to be late. Evan hurried downstairs without a second thought, still not prepared for what would go on at school.

When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he saw Mr. Heere, in a robe, with no pants, calmly sipping coffee as if this was a normal occurrence. Evan sighed. It had finally clicked just how different things were going to be.

———

Jeremy was... startled to say the least. Evan, his stepbrother, had almost seen him watching porn. Had he seen? Jeremy didn't think Evan had. He hoped Evan hadn't seen. That was going to be an awkward conversation. What would Evan even say? "Oh, I saw you watching porn this morning, wanna tell me about that?" Gah. That would be the worst.

Jeremy tried to seem as casual as possible as he walked down the stairs. Would Evan ask in front of his dad? Oh no. To be honest, Jeremy barely knew Evan. He knew he was Heidi's son, but... It wasn't like Evan talked to him a ton, not that he talked to Evan. His dad said that Evan had social anxiety. Jeremy was fairly awkward and the two just ended up just not talking a lot. Whenever Michael came over, he would try to talk to Evan, but he never wanted to play video games with them.

Anyways, Jeremy had stopped walking down the stairs, mind rushing when he overheard Evan and his dad talking. "Hello, Evan," Mr. Heere said before sipping his coffee.

"G-good morning, M-Mr. Heere," Evan replied with a stutter.

“Evan," Mr. Heere looked up, "You can call me dad."

"O-ok, Mr. Heere."

Jeremy smiled and walked the rest of the way downstairs, where he saw Evan looking around nervously and his dad standing pantsless, drinking his coffee. "Dad!" Jeremy called. No wonder Evan looked so awkward! His stepdad was pantsless and asking him to call him dad!

"Oh, hello, Jeremy. How are you?"

"Dad! Pants! Please!" Jeremy cried. His dad got out more often now then he used to, but he still had his moments. His pantsless moments.

Mr. Heere looked down as if just noticing he wasn't wearing any pants. "Oh, alright." He walked off to find some pants. He was also much better about putting pants on when he wasn't wearing them in the middle of the day.

"Sorry about that, Evan," Jeremy said. Evan looked up at him.

"It's not the first time that's happened," Evan murmured. Jeremy felt himself blushing in embarrassment. He looked away from Evan and grabbed a piece of toast. Evan stepped over and grabbed one with his good arm. Jeremy wasn't sure how Evan had broken his arm, but he had a cast. It was plain white, no signatures or anything. Maybe he should sign it... he felt kind of weird asking though.

"So," Jeremy started in between bites, "Are we taking the bus or walking?"

Evan looked panicked. 'W-what?"

"Um, are we taking the bus to school or are we walking?" Jeremy asked again.

"Wait... do we have to do one or the other?" Evan asked in distress.

Jeremy felt the tension building in the room. Maybe Evan didn't like deciding these things either. "Don't worry, honey, I'm driving you two on the way to work." Mrs. Hansen to the rescue. Evan sighed in relief.

"Oh, um thanks Mrs. Ha- Mom," Jeremy corrected himself.

"No problem, sweetie," Mrs. Hansen replied. "Are you two ready to go?"

Evan nodded and Jeremy replied with a, "Sure."

Mrs. Hansen opened the door and smiled warmly, "Alright boys, get your bags and then we can go!"

Evan got up and walked to his room to grab his bag and Jeremy did the same. Jeremy saw Evan in the hallway on the way back down and asked what was on his mind. "So... what's school like?"

"Fine," Evan responded.

"Okaaaay, are the people nice?"

Evan shrugged.

"Um, that's cool, I guess."

"There's a big library," Evan said eventually.

"Oh, um-"

"I go there after school sometimes."

"Fun," Jeremy replied. Maybe it was for Evan... but he would rather hang out with Michael.

They had reached the car by then. Evan got into the passenger seat, which left Jeremy sitting in the back.

Mrs. Hansen smiled over-enthusiastically and asked, "Are you two excited to start another year?"

Evan nodded, but he didn't seem very excited. "Oh, um, yeah, I guess..." Jeremy answered. Mrs. Hansen beamed in reply.

Jeremy hoped this school would be better. He didn't want anything like the whole squip scenario to happen again. That was... awful. He hoped people didn't make fun of him and Michael either. Michael was really his only friend, and he was honestly Jeremy's favorite person. He didn't deserve to be made fun of. Plus, people always said he and Michael were boyfriends, which, they weren't. Jeremy knew his best friend was gay, but he wasn't. Probably. Also, even though he got Christine Canigula to date him for a little bit, she ended up not liking him that way, which... stung. He finally got his crush to notice him. To date him even! And then she left him. He respected her decision to break up, and they were still friends, but that didn't mean it didn't still hurt.

"Jeremy. Jeremy!" They car had stopped and Evan had gotten out. They were at school. "Have a nice day!" Mrs. Hansen called as he got out of the car.

"You too!" Jeremy called back. 

He could see Evan still so he followed him inside. Inside, he saw Evan talking to a boy with short brown hair and glasses. He wore a t-shirt under a red button-up. The other boy was smiling and laughing. Evan looked like he was trying to smile, but he wasn't quite there. Among the crowd Jeremy saw a figure in a red sweatshirt with white headphones over his ears. "Michael!" Jeremy cried, rushing over to his friend.

Jeremy tapped him on the back and Michael spun around, pulling his headphones off of one ear. "Jeremy!" He smiled, "How's it going?"

"Oh! Good! How about you?"

"Nothin' much is going on. Unless you count school." Suddenly Michael's eyes went wide and he grabbed Jeremy's shoulder and spun him around.

"What is it?" Jeremy cried, looking back at Michael. Michael just pointed.

"Is that... Evan?"

A boy with dark, shoulder length hair and a black jacket had shoved Evan to the ground and was running off. Suddenly a girl with light brown hair was rushing over to Evan, offering him her hand and helping him up, speaking to him quickly. Jeremy felt himself blushing again. She was... cute.

"Jeremy?" Michael asked.

"Huh?" Jeremy asked, watching Evan and that girl. She was nice to help Evan up... And pretty. She was pretty too.

"What are you looking a- Who is she?”

“Beautiful,” Jeremy breathed, not processing that he had actually said it aloud. Michael looked to Jeremy with an expression somewhere between surprise and horror.

“Do you have a crush on her?” Michael asked.

 

 


	2. The Murphys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor is very gay and kinda having an existential crisis. Oh, and Zoe is being a good sibling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Uh, how’s it going? I’m good. Kinda tired and sick though. But uh, let me know what you think about this bad boy and stay swaggy!

Shit.

_SHIT_!

Connor had shoved a guy with a broken arm. That was a bad move. And then he had run off! Did that make him a dick? Probably. Yeah, that _definitely_ made him a dick. Connor slumped down in the bathroom stall he was hiding in, and put his head in his hands. Why did he have to do that? He was freaking out. That guy was kind of short with dirty blond hair. He was wearing a blue, striped shirt and khaki pants. And he had a cast. On his arm. Connor had pushed a guy with a broken arm. Why did he care? Really, why did he care what this guy thought of him? Connor knew why he cared, not that he wanted to admit it.

He hadn't just pushed a guy with a broken arm, he had pushed a _cute_ guy with a broken arm.

Connor knew he was gay, but... why did he feel this way about the broken arm kid?

Connor decided that his feelings were just being stupid... again. Wait. Was this a crush? Was Connor seriously crushing on the broken arm kid? Really? This was _just_ what he needed right now. He didn't need to deal with this right now.

He still wasn't over it. The broken arm kid? Of all people? He was really cute though... Connor felt himself blushing, and not just a little either. He felt like his whole face was literally burning red. This was... awful. Awful was the right word.

Connor heard the bathroom door open. Shit. Who was it? Hopefully they didn't question him being in there, ditching class. Wait. What if it was the broken arm kid? Connor hoped it was him. He had to apologize. He just wanted that guy to like him... was that so wrong? Was this weird? He didn't have many friends. Even Zoe was usually mad at him now. Connor opened the door, just a crack to see who it was.

"Connor Murphy, creeping on boys in the bathroom. What a surprise." Jared Kleinman. Ugh.

"Shut up, Kleinman." Connor slammed the door shut, but heard Jared laughing. Connor would've said something witty, but couldn't think of anything good right now. In fact, he was only really thinking about the broken arm guy.

Wait. Jared was talking to that guy before Connor pushed him, right? Connor tried to remember... he was, wasn't he? It seemed weird to ask, but Connor decided to keep track of Kleinman, in case he talked to that guy again.

Oh, well, he'd find that guy sooner or later. Or at least he hoped so.

———

Connor was hiding out in the library after school. It calmed him, being surrounded by all of the books. He could do anything there, travel anywhere with the right book. Plus it was quiet. That was nice too. Or at least it was usually quiet.

Connor glanced up from his book, hearing the annoying screech of a printer. He got up, he was going to have a word with whoever was printing crap this late.

He turned the corner and snatched the paper out of the printer. It was... a letter? "Dear Evan Hansen," it began. Jesus, whoever was writing to this Evan kid had some issues. The letter was kind of sad to be honest. Then came the weirdest part of the letter. It mentioned Zoe. His sister? Connor knew lots of people had crushes on his sister, but still. Why would someone print this out _at school_? Zoe could find it here! Connor looked up to find that guy, the cute broken arm kid staring at him in horror.

"I-I can explain," he stuttered. That was kind of... cute. Connor was speechless. "I, um, I have to... write letters to myself. My therapist w-wants me to, so I-I'm not writing to anyone. Y-you're h-her brother a-and I-I just, I-"

"No one's signed your cast." Crap. That was stupid. Why would he say that? A cute guy, who was probably straight, of course, was writing creepy letters to himself about Zoe and he comments about the _cast_? Why? Just... why?

"Oh, I-I, um, you can sign it if you want..." Evan said.

Connor pulled a marker out of his bag and nervously scrawled his name in big, black letters. it took up almost the entire cast.

"T-thanks," Evan trailed off.

Then Connor remembered what he had wanted to tell Evan. "I-I'm sorry I pushed you earlier." That was the first time he'd apologized to someone in awhile.

Evan smiled shyly. "Oh, um, thanks," he said quietly.

Connor felt himself blushing a little, he pushed his hair behind his ear. He suddenly flung out his hand, realizing he was still holding the letter. "Here!" He panicked shoving the letter into Evan's hands and ran off. It was only later that he realized that it was the first time someone had really smiled at him in awhile.

———

When Connor came home Zoe realized a few things were wrong. First off, he was home surprisingly early. Secondly, was he... smiling? That was weird. He bounded upstairs, and being curious about what would happen to make him like this, Zoe followed. Connor had flung his door shut, as usual. She pounded on it, not expecting him to answer. Instead he yelled, "It's unlocked!"

This was really weird. What the heck? She stepped inside. His room was a mess, and Connor was laying on his bed. Wait. Was he... smiling? It wasn't much, but enough that Zoe would question it, especially since he was in this weird mood.

"What the heck happened Connor? Are you high?" This wasn't what he was usually like when he was high. 

Connor glared at her. "No!" He lowered his  voice, "Not right now." Zoe smirked.

"What is it then?"

"Well, I... I met this guy..." Connor said quietly.

_‘WHAT?!’_ Zoe thought as she grinned and flopped down on Connor's bed next to him, "What kinda guy?"

"... a cute one."

Zoe knew her brother was gay... or at least not straight but... "Oh my god! What's he like? Does he go to our school? Does he-"

Connor took a deep breath, "Well, his name is Evan-"

Zoe was shocked, "Didn't you push him?" Connor nodded, "He had a broken arm you asshole!" Zoe punched her brother's shoulder lightly and he frowned.

"I-I know. I was stupid. But I didn't realize he was cute until _after_  I pushed him." Zoe snorted. "Come one, Zoe, don't be like that."

"I know, I know. But, hey! You like him!" Zoe knew Evan a little bit. He was quiet and seemed nice enough. She was surprised Connor knew of him and even more surprised that he liked him. She had to admit, they would make a cute couple though.

Connor's face suddenly darkened. "Zoe," He trailed off. "I-I think he's straight."

Zoe glanced at Connor. "Wait, why?"

Connor took a deep breath. "He-he had this letter... to himself... for therapy. And, um, it was about you." Zoe looked confused. "He, um, Evan has a crush on you, Zoe."

 


	3. How to get an Oblivious Boy to Like You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy is crushing on Zoe and goes searching for advice. Meanwhile, Michael talks to Christine about why Jeremy always falls for random girls he doesn’t even know, while looking for some dating advice of his own.

Jeremy's first day at school was pretty uneventful. It was fine but... nothing really happened. Well, he did see that girl. 

Jeremy had figured out her name, Zoe. Her name was Zoe Murphy. And that guy who had pushed Evan? That was her _brother_. Jeremy wasn't sure about him. He seemed like a jerk. Anyways, Jeremy wasn't thinking too much about that after school. He was too busy playing _Apocalypse of the Damned_ with Michael.

"So..." Michael began.

"What?" I asked.

"Have you talked to Evan again?"

Oh. "Um, we talked this morning," not much, but would Michael really care?

"That's cool. He seems nice. I don't think he really plays video games though." Jeremy chuckled. Yeah. Evan didn't play video games. He wondered if Evan even knew what _Apocalypse of the Damned_ was. "Y'know, Jer, you should talk to him more. I think you'd get along."

"I guess..." Jeremy muttered. Wait. What if he asked Evan about Zoe? He probably knew her, or at least knew about her. "Um, Michael?"

Michael looked back at Jeremy. "Yeah?"

"What if I asked Evan about Zoe?" Michael seemed to freeze up. He looked shocked. Suddenly a hoard of zombies attacked his character. That put Michael back in action. He paused the game and looked back at Jeremy.

"What! Why?" He seemed... uncomfortable. "You, um, you just met her, and, um, you haven't even talked to her. Are you sure that yo-"

"Michael," Jeremy groaned. "Why don't you want me to talk to her?"

"No, no no! It's not that! It's just..."

"What? It's just what?" Jeremy questioned eagerly. Why would Michael want to keep him away from Zoe? They were friends, right? Was something wrong? 

"I don't want another Christine," Michael said with a small voice. "I don't want that for you."

"Michael..." Jeremy's voice was soft. Christine had broken up with him awhile ago. They were barely together after the whole squip scenario. A few weeks after they started dating, Christine told Jeremy that she didn't feel anything for him, and... that was it. Jeremy let her go. He just wanted her to be happy but it hit him hard. Michael knew that. He just didn't want Jeremy to get his heart broken again. Michael looked up at Jeremy and met his eyes. "I, um, well, thanks for caring about me, but-"

"Jer, I just want you to be happy."

"Yeah, well, I think that being with Zoe will make me happy."

"But, Jer, I-" Michael tried to say.

"Michael! Do you want me to be happy?" Michael looked upset, but he nodded, "Then help me get with her!"

"I-I'm gonna go." Michael set his controller down, slung his bag over his shoulder and walked out.

Jeremy felt guilty for making Michael upset, but it was kind of annoying that Michael wasn't on his side about this. They were supposed to be a team. Did Michael forget that? He'd text Michael later, maybe call him.

Jeremy turned off the Wii and went to find Evan. He found Evan on his computer in his room. "Hey, can we talk?"

Evan looked up and shut his computer when he saw Jeremy. "Um, s-sure."

"So... um, what do you know about Zoe Murphy?"

"Zoe Murphy?" Evan questioned.

"Yeah, her."

"W-why?" Evan asked nervously.

"Well, I-I have a crush on her," Jeremy admitted.

"Oh. OH!" Evan exclaimed, finally realizing what Jeremy said. 

Jeremy stood there awkwardly but realized he maybe shouldn't have asked. "I-if you two are a thing then I can, um, go." Jeremy blushed and looked away from Evan.

He was about to leave when Evan interjected, "Wait! I mean, we, um w-we aren't dating if, well, if that's what you're asking." The idea that Jeremy thought that he and Zoe Murphy were dating made Evan feel... weird. He felt so bad that he and Jeremy could possibly have a crush on her at the same time as him too. What if they fought over her? What if they treated her as no more than an object to be won? Evan couldn’t let them do that. Plus, if he hadn’t started dating, or making any progress really, with Zoe by now, it wasn’t like he was ever going to, right?

Jeremy relaxed and turned around. "Okay then. Well, um, what's she like?"

"I, um, I used to have a crush on her too..." Evan explained, causing Jeremy to blush even harder. "I-I don't anymore though. I don't t-think I do... She, um, she's nice. Really nice! But, I, um, I think I like her better as a friend. I mean, if we could be friends." It was half true. Evan would love it if they could be friends! He still kind of liked her, but he had accepted his fate to be single by now. But if they could be friends... at least he could finally talk to her.

Jeremy had assumed they knew each other, or were at least friends, when he saw them talking. Apparently not. "If you don't know her that well, I can go."

"Oh! No! I-I know- It's fine. I know a bit about her. She, um, she's a good dancer. And she, um, s-she scribbles stars on h-her j-jeans when she's,um, she's bored. She dyed her hair indigo for a bit. And y’know those te-teen magazines? Well, she still fills out the quizzes and-“

"That's cool, but do you know, y'know, what she _likes_ or anything?" Jeremy interjected. "N-not to be rude," he added. He didn't want to offend Evan.

Evan blushed. "Oh! Well, I, um... No. Not really. I'm sorry Jeremy."

Jeremy sighed. "It's fine Evan. I just assumed you knew her."

"Oh, thanks," Evan said quietly, but Jeremy had already slipped out of the room.

Jeremy decided he should text Michael. What would he say though? "I'm sorry I called you out for not accepting my crush and I hope we can still be friends even though you aren't respecting who I like"? As if. Jeremy stared at his phone, typing and retyping until he thought of something decent to say. And he sent it.

**Jeremy: Hey Michael! I'm sorry about earlier... I got carried away. I've thought about it and I really hope you'll help me get with Zoe. You're the best!**

He saw Michael typing, but he must've deleted it, because nothing ever sent. He hoped Michael didn't take it to hard. He knew Michael cared for him and he cared for Michael too. He just didn't want this to get between them. But maybe it already had.

———

**Jeremy: Hey** **Michael! I'm sorry about earlier... I got carried away. I've thought about it and I really hope you'll help me get with Zoe. You're the best!**

What was that supposed to mean? It was late, and Michael still hadn't figured it out. Apparently Jeremy cared more about being with whatever girl he's crushing on at the time than being friends with him. But that couldn't be true, could it? Jeremy was his best friend, his player two, and those people don't just give up on you. Right? _Right_? Jesus, he was terrified. He didn't want Jeremy to give him up... again. Last time was kind of because of the squip but... after Jeremy got with Christine he started spending less and less time with Michael. He was busy with other stuff.

Michael ran a hand through his hair. He should probably fall asleep. That's what he was _trying_ to do! But he was too busy thinking. He couldn't. Michael rolled over and fumbled around in the dark for his phone. Eventually he found what felt very much like a phone and pulled it towards him. He turned it on. Yep. It was his phone. 

Michael had a call to make. He needed to talk to someone, and he knew who that someone was. He looked until he found the right person, and called.

"Michael? It's late. Shouldn't you be sleeping or something?" Asked the voice on the other end.

"Christine," he began quietly, "It's about Jer."

He heard Christine gasp. " _What_? What happened?"

"Well, um, I-I think Jer is, um," Michael took a deep breath, "He's crushing on this girl. But he just met her and they haven't even talked! A-and I, um, I think she's just gonna leave him again." Michael felt tears coming to his eyes. "I-I just don't want him to be hurt again." That was when Michael started crying. Silent sobs wraked his body. "I c-can't watch h-him do that to h-himself a-again!"

"Michael..." Christine said quietly. "I'm so sorry."

"I-It's just _every single time_ I-I have to watch h-him go through that a-and it hurts! I-it hurts to s-see him sad. A-and knowing t-that he w-wants to go straight back to it h-hurts."

"Michael, listen."

"A-and I can't d-do it. H-he just runs b-back in and h-he doesn't even know. He d-doesn't even k-know how much I l-lo-"

"MICHAEL!" Christine raised her voice, grabbing Michael's attention.

He murmured a pathetic sounding, "Yeah," in response.

"So, is this the first time he's done this?"

"N-no. He, um, he did it with you... I guess."

"Well, did you talk to him about it?"

"I-I tried."

"Wait. Did you two... _argue_ or something?You guys never argue! You're, like, best friends. You guys are like _insanely_ close. Has he been acting weird recently?"

"I mean, h-he's been different since the squip... but only a little bit! And you know he took it hard when you broke up with him."

"Maybe he just wants another relationship. Maybe he thinks that will make him feel better. I mean, we weren't together very long. He might think if he finds someone else he'll be happier."

The idea of it made Michael feel sick. "B-but he has me! I-I'm his _best friend_! His player one!"

"Michael..." but Michael had already started sobbing harder. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm sure he doesn't feel that way. Maybe he just-" Michael hung up. He felt bad for hanging up on Christine but he just needed some time to calm down. His phone rang. She was trying to call him back. He let it ring.

After Christine broke up with Jeremy, Michael had gone to ask her why. He hadn't been sure about Jer and Christine being together, but it made his friend happy, so he dealt with it. That also meant he got less time with Jeremy, but again, if Jeremy was happy Michael would be happy too. Or, that's how he wanted to feel. Anyways, he and Christine had started talking about it. She had told him that she just didn't feel anything for Jeremy. And that would've been it, but they kept talking. Christine knew Michael was gay. He came out to her shortly after he came out to Jeremy. And he told her the things he couldn't tell Jeremy. How he felt about his best friend. Jer knew that he talked to Christine a lot. After they broke up, Jeremy was awkward around her, but could he be... jealous of Michael's relationship with her?

He called Christine back. He _had_ to know what she thought.

"C-Christine? I'm sorry I hung up on you."

"Michael, it's fine. I'm sorry I brought that up."

"Um... do you think Jer could be... um, jealous?"

"Jealous? Of what?"

"Um, that I still talk to you..."

"Oh! I mean, its the best explanation so far. I'd ask him about it. Go for it Michael, he won't care."

Christine hung up as Michael murmured, "okay."

He would do that... some day... maybe. What if Jeremy wouldn't talk to him after that? Would he care? Ugh. This was hard. What would he even say? He laid in bed, tears dripping down his face, wondering if Jeremy Heere would ever return Michael's feelings for him. If Jeremy would ever be in love with him.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So, stuff is about to start going down... Let me know what you think so far! Stay swaggy!


	4. We Gotta Stop for Frozen Yogurt First

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heidi suggests that Jeremy and Evan go get froyo after the first week of school, and the pair run into someone unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stuff is gonna start going down! Get pumped! Also I’m still a little sick. Oh well.

The first week of school had passed in a blur. Evan had been occupied with homework, giving Jeremy advice about Zoe, and wondering why Connor Murphy had talked to him on the first day of school.

After school on Friday, Heidi had suggested that Evan and Jeremy go get ice cream, or something, to celebrate. Evan knew that she just wanted them to bond, and although it would probably be awkward, Evan didn't mind. It’s the thought that counts. Jeremy had asked if there were any froyo shops around. So, they looked it up, found the closest one, and left.

It was called _Yo!_  and to be honest, it was the first time Evan had tried froyo. Jeremy seemed to love it though, and was eagerly digging into his when he mentioned, "Last year, my friends and I used to go get froyo all the time." Jeremy had never talked about his old school to Evan before. Evan was curious, but felt weird asking. Should he ask?

"Um," Evan thought about asking. Maybe he shouldn't, but Jeremy was already looking up at him, expecting him to talk, Which made him feel bad _not_ saying anything. "I, um, I heard t-that some b-big thing happened at your s-school last year..."

Jeremy looked annoyed. Then his face softened a bit and he replied, "Oh. The squips." He laughed nervously, "It's kinda a funny story." Evan must've seemed like he wanted to hear, because Jeremy began to tell him about it. Evan learned about the squips and how they traveled through your bloodstream and into your brain. He learned about how Jeremy had been with some girl named Brooke for a while because of the squip, and that they sorted things out and remained friends once the whole situation was over. He learned about how Jeremy had shut Michael out, and how Michael had still found out that Mountain Dew Red could stop the squips and helped to shut them off. Apparently, turning one off started a huge chain reaction which turned off the others, including Jeremy’s squip. Jeremy must've been really lucky to have someone like Michael there. Someone who would have Jeremy's back even though he was being a jerk. He also learned about Christine. Jeremy seemed almost sad when he talked about Christine, like he missed her even though they broke up. It was probably just that Jeremy missed all of his friends after moving, but it seemed like he missed Christine the most.

"Oh, um, that's cool," Evan said, once Jeremy had finished. Jeremy laughed. "What?" Evan asked. Did he say something wrong? Was Jeremy judging him?

"That was just the most casual response to that story _ever_."

"Oh!" Evan laughed a little too. Nervously, since he wasn't sure if he should be laughing or not, but Jeremy didn't seem to notice.

"What time is Mrs. Ha- I mean mom picking us up?" 

"4:50," Evan answered.

Jeremy glanced at the clock on the back wall. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I'll be back in a minute." Jeremy got off of his chair and walked off.

A bell jingled as the door opened and Evan saw a figure in a red sweatshirt enter with his headphones on. As soon as he saw Evan, Michael wandered over to his table. He looked... anxious? "Hi, Evan. Is, um, is Jer here?"

"H-he went to the bathroom."

"Oh, good." Good? Evan thought Michael would _want_ to see Jeremy, not avoid him. Evan must've looked surprised because Michael added, "I wanted to ask you something."

Evan paused. "Okay?"

"I... has Jeremy _mentioned_ me or anything? Recently. Or ever I guess. I know you two don't talk a lot, but..."

"We, um, talked about the squips today."

Michael seemed surprised, "Really?"

"Um, he seemed really glad that, um, you were there to h-help him."

Michael smiled, but seemed tense. "Oh, thanks, Evan. Did he seem, I dunno, weird or anything talking about it?"

"H-he seemed kind of sad when he talked about this girl, Christine." Michael frowned and his eyes darkened. Maybe he shouldn't have told Michael. He didn't want Jeremy to be mad at him. Would he care that he was sharing their conversation? 

Evan must've been thinking aloud because Michael responded, "Look, I don't want to hurt Jer. He just... I don't want him to get hurt again. With a girl..."

Oh. Zoe. Of course. "That's nice. I know you care for him a lot." After Evan said that, Michael blushed. Weird. "I think he cares for you a lot too. He seems really happy whenever he's with you. You haven't been over in a couple days, Michael. He seems kind of restless without you there."

Michael frowned. "Really?" Evan nodded quickly. What was going on between them? Michael's eyes focused on something behind Evan. "Sorry, Evan. I gotta go." Michael rushed out of the building without even getting froyo.

Evan looked back and Jeremy walked up next to him, he looked shocked. "W-was that Michael?" Evan nodded. Jeremy's face became worried, "I-I have to go." Evan was concerned. Go where? "I'll be back in one minute, Evan." And then he ran out the door, after Michael.

———

"Michael! Michael, wait!" Jeremy called flinging open the door of the froyo shop. Michael, who was quickly walking away glanced over his shoulder. He looked upset. Had Jeremy done something wrong? It _had_ felt like Michael had been avoiding him the past couple days. Even when they were together, Michael had been really quiet. He had seemed... Nervous? Unsettled? It was hard to tell, but Jeremy knew him well enough to tell something was wrong. "Michael, what's wrong?" he called again. Jeremy ran faster to catch Michael, who had turned the corner. "Michael!" he cried. Michael had stoped and was turned around, staring at Jeremy sadly. "Hey bud, are you okay?" Jeremy walked up to him.

Michael met his eyes and smiled nervously. "I-I'm fine, Jer. R-really."

"You don't seem fine." Jeremy put his hand on Michael's shoulder. "What's wrong, dude?"

"I-I... never mind." 

"Michael," Jeremy looked his friend in the eyes. "You can tell me anything, you know that right?" He still looked uncomfortable so Jeremy kept going, "Um, I can start if you want. I... I've really missed you this week. I know I was a little... intense about Zoe, but you come first. You're my best friend, I don't know what I'd do without you." Michael frowned just a little, but it was enough that Jeremy noticed. "I just thought that maybe having a girlfriend would, I don't know... make things seem more, um, normal."

Michael closed his eyes tightly, obviously fighting back tears. Apparently that was the wrong thing to say. "Jer... things have been awkward between us for awhile." Jeremy tilted his head. Since when? "When you dated Christine..." Oh. "You, I mean _we_  hung out less and less. And you didn't even notice." Jeremy did notice. He didn't like it, but he figured it was just a side effect of having a girlfriend. He honestly had _really_  wished he could be with Michael on multiple occasions. Was that weird? "And then Christine broke up with you, and..." Michael was instantly there for him when Christine broke up with him, so he assumed he didn't mind the breakup so much. Wait. Was it the breakup, or how Jeremy had reacted to it? It was sweet that Michael cared for him so much. And then he noticed Michael had started crying. 

Jeremy didn't know what to do. He _hated_  seeing Michael hurt like that. And it was even worse knowing it was his fault. What was he supposed to do?! Shit! Was he about to start crying too? The only thing going through his head was that he hurt Michael and he _had_ to fix it. What would Michael do? 

Jeremy wrapped his arms around Michael, hugging him tightly. "I'm sorry, Michael. I'm so sorry," he cried into his friend's shoulder.

Michael wasn't quite sure what had happened. He was crying, and then Jeremy was hugging him. Michael tried to stop crying, but couldn't. Jeremy smelled like, well, Jeremy which was... nice. He was more comfortable with Jeremy right then than he had been in awhile. Michael felt Jeremy rest his head on his shoulder. That's when Michael actually realized what was happening. Jeremy Heere, his best friend and crush, was hugging Michael and resting his head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," Jeremy whispered. Crap. Jeremy was crying too. Michael panicked and hugged him back.

"I love you," Michael breathed. Wait... SHIT! He didn't mean to say that. It was really quiet, maybe Jeremy didn't hear. Hopefully Jeremy didn't he-

"I love you too," Jeremy said instinctively. Michael felt his face go red. Did he mean it, or... It hurt Michael just to think about it. He would rather know than question it forever though. As much as he didn't want to, Michael peeled himself out of Jeremy's arms. 

"Jeremy..."

Jeremy looked nervous. "What? What's wrong?" He must've realized what he'd said because he blushed and looked away. "Michael, I, um..."

"D-did you mean it?" Michael asked, already regretting it. Why did he have to say he loved Jeremy? Why?

”I, uh... Did you?” Jeremy replied, diverting the question. Michael was in too much panic to care. He nodded slowly.

"I-I... How long have you... um, you known that you..." Jeremy asked nervously.

"Um, I don't know... Eighth Grade? Freshman Year? A long time," Michael admitted slowly.

Jeremy blushed, "T-that long?"

"Um, yeah. I'm sorry... I just didn't want you to hate me," he replied sadly.

"Michael..." Jeremy looked Michael in the eye, “I don't think I could ever hate you." Jeremy stepped closer to him, so they were almost touching. Michael's breath caught. Jeremy was _really_ close to him. He was still anxious though. Jer might not _hate_ him, but things could still be awkward between them. Michael was nervous. Really nervous. What was he supposed to do? To say? How was he supposed to-

And then Jeremy reached down and kissed him.

 

 


	5. Dear Connor Murphy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael get into some... stuff. And a week later, Connor gets himself into a sticky situation with Evan after school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey... So I guess it’s kinda important to mention that there is a time jump in the middle of this chapter. It’s when it starts talking about Connor, so... yeah. That’s all. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

Holy shit. Jeremy was kissing Michael Mell. MICHAEL. MELL. 

He didn't realize exactly how he would feel until he was doing it and it was... amazing

He had felt different around Michael for awhile. He sometimes got this... fluttery feeling in his chest when he was around Michael. And he was always disappointed when one of them had to leave the other. And he had started to notice things... Like the exact chocolatey brown of his eyes or how he looked when he ran his hands through his hair or how cute it was when he smiled. Not that often, but it happened. Looking back on it, Jeremy thought it couldn't be more obvious. He was never sure if he was gay or straight or bi... but he decided that he probably wasn't straight. Definitely not.

How he felt seemed a little strange to him, but he figured that's how most people felt about their best friends. Maybe he was wrong though. 

Michael had frozen up for a moment, but suddenly he was kissing Jeremy back.

Jeremy remembered when Michael came out. 

Michael was sleeping over at Jeremy's house and they were just about to go to sleep. All of the lights were off and they were both inside their sleeping bags on the basement floor. It was quiet and all of a sudden Michael said, "Jer, I have something to tell you."

"Yeah?" He had mumbled back.

"I... I'm," he took a deep breath, "Jer, I'm gay."

Jeremy had gotten that warm, fluttery feeling in his chest. At the time he had thought it was just because he was happy that Michael trusted him enough to come out to him. Maybe that wasn't it. Even though his friend couldn't see it, Jeremy smiled. "That's cool, bud," Jeremy had been _really_ tired and couldn't think of anything else to say. Did he need to say anything else? He wasn't sure... No one had come out to him before. He had thought about saying something else, but he had fallen asleep before he could.

Jeremy's mind was rushing. Kissing Michael was... It felt more real than any relationship he had been in before. But it felt like as soon as it had began, it was over. He looked up at Michael, whose face was bright red. Jeremy was sure he was blushing too, but he didn't even care. 

"Michael, I-" Jeremy breathed.

"I-I um, didn't realize y-you guys were a, um, a thing..." A voice cut him off. The pair looked towards the voice and noticed Evan standing there awkwardly. He was fidgeting and seemed nervous. 

Jeremy gave Michael a glance as if to ask ‘ _Are we a "thing"?’_ Michael smiled nervously, but he nodded. 

"I, um... Mom's here. It's t-time to go."

Oh. Jeremy looked back at Michael. "Um... Do you wanna, I don't know, come over, or something?"

Michael grinned and they headed towards the Hansen's car.

———

It was a Thursday, and Connor had only learned three useful things in school that week:

**1.** Evan Hansen was _friends_ with Jared Kleinman. When he had seen them together ton the first day of school, he had hoped Jared was just sharing his annoyingness with whatever unsuspecting victim (in this case, Evan) he could find. Sadly, this wasn't the case. Somehow, Evan, a sweet, socially anxious kid, was friends with _Jared Kleinman_ , a loud, obnoxious asshole. He sat with Jared and some girl, whose name he thought was Alana, at lunch everyday, which made speaking with him difficult. This was Connor's least favorite of the three things.

**2.** Evan had a brother. Well, a stepbrother. His name was Jeremy, and he was a junior, like Zoe. Jeremy was tall and skinny, taller than Evan at least. It sounded like he was new at school, but Connor wasn't really sure. It wasn't like he payed that much attention to most people. Jeremy was usually hanging around this other guy, Michael. He had dark hair and glasses and was always wearing this red sweatshirt. Connor wasn't quite sure about the two of them, but he decided that maybe he should try to get them to like him. Evan might like him better then.

**3.** Number three was Connor's favorite of the things he had learned. Evan was in not one, but two of his classes. He had math in the mornings at the same time as Evan. Of course he didn't realize this at first, since he had ditched his first classes on the first day. He also had English with Evan in the afternoon. It was actually his last class of the day. This meant that he always got to see Evan at the beginning of the day, which he loved, and he got to see him at the end, which gave him something to look forward to. Getting to see Evan kept him going throughout the day. It was... nice. 

Connor was thinking about this when someone tapped him on the shoulder. He was annoyed. Couldn't this person just let him be? He spun around asking, "What do you want?"

Connor glared up at a very nervous looking Evan. As soon as he realized this, his gaze softened. "I-I, um, C-Connor? I-it's time to g-go," Evan stuttered. 

"Oh." Connor got up from the desk and slung his bag over his shoulder. He started to walk to the door when he realized Evan wasn't coming. He looked over his shoulder, "Are you coming?" 

Evan looked terrified, but he nodded and quickly walked towards Connor. 

They walked side by side, silently. Evan seemed very tense, like he just wanted to get away from Connor. After awhile, Connor asked, "Are you nervous?" He didn't _mean_ to say it aloud, but he did. He realized that his voice sounded very monotonous, not at all like he actually cared how Evan was doing. He sounded more like he was going to laugh at Evan if he said yes.

"S-sorry. I-I just get n-nervous easily... especially a-around people..." Evan looked straight ahead. He would probably _never_ want to look at Connor. 

Connor tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, thinking. He barely knew anything about Evan... Well, he did know things about him, but not what mattered. He didn't know what Evan liked to do or his favorite color or what he had done all summer long. 

They turned the corner to the library and Evan stuck with him, so he must've been headed there too. He didn't know how Evan felt, but Connor didn't mind that they were headed for the same place.

"Are you going to write another one of those letters to yourself?" Connor asked. Wait. Shit! That was a bad question. Why did he ask that? Was that too personal? Probably for Evan it was. He barely knew the guy!

Evan's cheeks blushed a little bit. "Uh, I-I was going t-to..."

"You're not anymore?" Connor cut in. "What? You're afraid I'll read it again?"

Evan looked panicked and seemed a little shaky. Had that even occurred to Evan before he had mentioned it? Shit. This was bad. "I-I... um, you s-see..." He _had_ to fix this.

"Look, if it makes you feel better, I'll right a letter to myself and you can read it." Wait, what? Had he actually just said that? He had ditched the therapy sessions his parents tried to set up for a reason. And now he was just going to spill his heart out to Evan Hansen of all people? Evan looked skeptical. Connor realized Evan must not believe him so he sat down at the nearest computer and leaned back in his chair. "What am I supposed to do?" He asked Evan. No going back now.

Evan still seemed nervous but he responded, "W-well, you're supposed t-to, um, s-start out with 'D-dear Connor Murphy,'" Connor quickly typed it in. 

"Now what?"

"N-now you write a-about how your d-day was. Or you c-can write about why it's g-going to be a good day. It's kind of l-late, but..."

Okay. He could do this. Doing it without revealing his crush would be... harder, but do-able.

_Dear Connor Murphy,_

_Today was fine (at best!). Classes were boring as always. Nothing happened. Big surprise! I wasn't high or on drugs today. Zoe keeps telling me to stop. At least she used to... she might have lost hope in me by now. Oh well, she'd be proud, I guess. But I might go back tomorrow... or tonight, really. I don't know._

Connor heard Evan gasp quietly behind him. He must've been reading over his shoulder. "What?" He looked back to see Evan fidgeting and looking... concerned? 

"Y-you shouldn't be smoking drugs."

Connor snorted. "Smoking drugs?"

Evan blushed. "T-that's not what I meant! I-I just... thought m-maybe you would be b-better off _not_ doing that. I mean, i-it's safer. S-something bad could happen t-to you! You could d-die! A-and that would be a-awful!"

"You'd care if I died?" Connor was surprised. He didn't think he meant that much to Evan.

Evan looked startled that he'd ask that. "I-I mean, it would be a b-big deal." Oh. Of course. "A-and imagine how Zoe would feel! Or y-your parents..." Of course Evan didn't feel that way about him. Would anyone feel that way about him? Connor frowned and got back to his letter.

_Well, if I'm not counting classes, nothing good really happened._ Well, Evan did, but he wasn't about to write that in front of him. _Not that classes were that great. No one talked to me. Big surprise! It's not like I have any friends. And it's not like anyone would want to talk to me. I don't blame them. I wouldn't want to either. I'm just an insensitive dick who can't seem to get anything right. I wouldn't know how to get along with people if I tried. It sucks. It's my own fault no one likes me. And I don't even know how to get it right. I don't know how to get it right. How do I get it right? How does anyone get it ri-_

Connor felt something on his face. Was he... crying? Oh shit, he was. _That_ was embarrassing. He glanced back over his shoulder at Evan. His eyes were glued to the screen and his eyes were filled to the brim with tears which rolled down his cheeks.

"Shit. I'm sorry Evan. I-um, are you okay?"

Evan wiped his eyes with his hands. "Y-yeah. I-I'm fine, C-Connor."

"You don't seem fine. Usually people don't cry when they're fine, right?"

"I-it's just that, um, y-you seem so alone, a-and I-I... I feel like that t-too sometimes. L-like no one gets me. A-and it hurts. I-I'm sorry Connor. I-I'm really s-sorry."

"No, Evan. Don't be sorry. It's not your fault." Evan made him happy. Why did he feel like it was his fault?

"C-could, um, we be friends?" _What_? "I-if you want to!" Evan quickly added. 

"I... I would like that. I think. Um, I'm sorry, Evan, I really am."

"No! Don't be! I-I know what it's like to be alone... I just d-don't want that for you. Or a-anyone! B-but having a friend would be n-nice."

Didn't Evan have Jared? Or Jeremy? Or... anyone? If Evan felt alone, he was going to help him. No matter what. He didn't care if Evan didn't feel the same way about him.

"Yeah. I think having a friend would be pretty good right about now."

 


	6. Heidi Hansen’s Attempt at Bonding Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael try to figure out what is going on between them. Heidi wants Evan to hang out with Jared more, and she comes up with the idea for Jeremy, Michael, Evan, and Jared to all go get breakfast together.

It was finally Friday again, and Michael was planning to sleep over at Jeremy's house. He was a little nervous, they hadn't exactly defined what was going on with their relationship, but they could figure it out if they needed to. Besides, Jer _had_ kissed him. That seemed like maybe, just maybe, he wanted to be with Michael. As more than a best friend. He wasn't quite sure. That day, Jer had sent him a questioning glance after Evan made some comment about them being together, so he had nodded, even though he wasn't _quite_ sure what Jeremy was implying. He had a few guesses though. They had been closer then they had been in awhile though. That was nice.

Michael knocked on the door and quickly heard a muffled, "I'll get it!" A few seconds later, Jeremy flung the door open. "Michael!" He said excitedly. His whole face lit up, like Michael being there was a pleasant surprise, rather than expected. Michael felt himself smiling back at him. Oh God. That was cute. "C-come in, buddy!"

Michael stepped inside. "Um, where should I put my stuff?" At Jeremy's old house, they would usually just ditch their stuff in the basement, near the TV, but he had moved so Michael wasn't quite sure anymore.

"Oh. You can just put it in the basement. C'mon!" Jeremy bounded down the stairs, pausing a few stairs down to wait for his friend to follow. Michael dropped his backpack at the bottom of the stairs, causing Jeremy to ask, "Wait. You didn't bring a sleeping bag?"

"Crap! I _knew_ I forgot something!"

"Oh! It's fine. We can sleep in my room." Wait. Did he mean... Michael felt himself blush lightly. Jeremy must've realized what he was thinking because his face went red and he started stuttering, "T-that's not what I m-meant! I-I have a s-sleeping bag y-you can use... if you want to." He said the last part so quietly, Michael barely heard him.

"Yeah. That's cool. Thanks Jer." He grinned. "So... Apocalypse of the Damned?" 

Jeremy smiled, grabbing the remotes. They sat down on the beanbags in front of the TV and started to play. After a few minutes, they got into their usually rhythm. Michael loved Apocalypse of the Damned. It was his favorite game, but he liked it even more when he was playing with Jeremy. It was comforting to know that someone had his back. They breezed through a few levels, their talking occasionally interrupted by one of them warning the other of approaching zombies. 

Eventually, after a few unsuccessful attempts at level 15, Jeremy paused the game and asked, "Hey, Michael? Do you wanna, like, get some food or something?"

He _was_ hungry now that Jeremy mentioned it. "Sure, Jer. Um, what time is it?"

"Shit! It's almost midnight."

"Do you wanna order pizza, or something?"

Jeremy looked confused, "Are pizza shops open this late?"

"I dunno. Some probably are." 

Jeremy laughed a little before saying, "Maybe we should just eat something here."

"Oh. That's fine."

They wandered upstairs quietly, so they wouldn't wake up Jeremy's parents or Evan. They snuck into the kitchen and looked for something to eat. "Do you want chips?" Jeremy asked, holding up a large bag of potato chips. 

"Oh, sure. Can we make sandwiches or something?"

Michael could make out Jeremy smiling through the darkness. "Yeah! That's a good idea, but we need to be quiet. I can make them if you want."

"Um, thanks. I'll try to open the chips... quietly." Jeremy laughed, knowing what Michael was about to get himself into. Jeremy shuffled around in the fridge while Michael fumbled with the chip bag, which crinkled loudly. Every time he tried to open it, it seemed so loud that he stopped. Jeremy was done with the sandwiches by the time Michael decided just to rip it open. 

"Nice job opening the chips, Michael," Jeremy laughed. Michael was glad it was dark, because he felt his cheeks heating up. It was nice seeing Jeremy laugh, and soon enough he was laughing too. 

They wandered back downstairs with their food and ate in silence until Jeremy asked, "Do you wanna watch a movie or something?"

Michael nodded, "Yeah, sure," he replied without much emotion.

"Michael?" He looked at Jeremy, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's just... What's going on between us, Jer?"

"What do you mean?" Jeremy asked, looking concerned.

"I-I mean, the other day, when we... y'know, kissed. H-how do you feel about it? About me?"

Jeremy scooted closer to Michael. Did he mean to do that? "Listen. I meant what I said, Michael." And then he leaned in and kissed Michael's cheek. "I love you."

"B-but, are we..."

"Are we what?"

"Jer, are we dating or not?"

Jeremy blushed and spoke quietly. "I-I would like to. I realized t-that the other day."

"I-I think I would too. I _know_ I would."

Jeremy smiled and leaned into Michael's shoulder. "Good."

After they finished eating, they changed into pajamas and started a movie. About ten minutes in, Jeremy whispered, "Michael?"

"Yeah?" He whispered back.

"I'm cold."

"Um, is there a blanket down here, or anything?"

"I don't know."

Then Michael got an idea. "You, um... You can wear my sweatshirt, if you want."

Jeremy smiled tiredly, "I would like that." He slipped the sweatshirt over his head and handed it to Jeremy, who slid it over his head. He suddenly leaned over and kissed Michael, right on the lips. Michael was surprised at first, startled even, he still wasn't used to this. Suddenly he was kissing Jeremy back. It seemed to end too quickly though. Jeremy rested his head on Michael's shoulder and murmured, "I love you."

It couldn't have been ten minutes later when Michael realized Jeremy was asleep. "Jeremy? Jer? Jer?" He asked. No response. Jeremy looked so... peaceful. His lips were slightly parted and his hair was a mess. It was kinda cute. He needed to get Jeremy upstairs, but he felt bad waking him up. "Jer? You gotta get up."

Michael shook his shoulder lightly and Jeremy murmured, "Just five more minutes," but didn't open his eyes. Could he... carry Jer up? Probably not. He started to get up when Jeremy wrapped his arms around him. "Nooooo," Jeremy complained. Oh, _that_ was cute.

He moved Jer's arms so he could support him when he attempted to walk him upstairs. "We gotta go, Jer." He stood up, pulling the other boy with him. Jeremy's knees buckled, but after a second, he was kind of supporting himself. The two stumbled up the stairs, Michael careful to make sure Jeremy didn't get hurt. Jeremy was somehow still half asleep by the time they got to his room. 

Michael attempted to lay Jeremy down on his bed, but Jeremy clung to Michael murmuring, "Nooooo," or "Stayyyyy." 

"Jer, you have to sleep."

"Stayyyyy," Jeremy murmured again.

Wait. Oh God. This probably wasn't a good idea, so why did he want to do it? Michael climbed into the bed next to Jeremy, pulling up the blankets. He was just waiting until Jeremy would let him get out. That was all. He tried to tell himself that over and over again. Jeremy rolled over closer to him. Michael blushed. He didn't realize how tired he was, but soon enough Michael had fallen asleep too.

———

Mrs. Hansen had suggested that Evan should have Jared over. Jared was basically Evan's only friend, besides Connor, of course. Jared was a _family friend_  though. That meant that since their parents liked each other, they had to as well. Evan wasn't sure about that idea, but Jared was usually nice enough to him, so he went with it. 

He knew Jared wasn't a big fan of Connor though, so he made a note not to hang out with them at the same time. Oh well. Maybe Connor would grow on Jared. Anyways, Mrs. Hansen knew Evan wouldn't ask Jared to come over, so she did it herself. Evan was a little embarrassed, but he  didn't really care. But he didn't realize they were going out for breakfast until she asked Evan to wake Jeremy and Michael up. 

Evan wasn't quite sure where they had decided to sleep, but he knew they had been in the basement for most of the night, so he checked there first. Other than Michael's backpack and a few empty plates, there was no sign of them. 

Evan walked back upstairs to Jeremy's room and opened the door. "Jeremy, Michael! I-it's time to g-get u-" That was when he noticed they were both in Jeremy's bed. Together. Asleep. Jeremy was curled up right next to Michael,  who didn't have much room. He didn't seem to care, but that might've been because he was asleep. Jeremy's arms were wrapped around Michael, who was just waking up. 

Michael's eyes widened when he realized where he was, but they seemed to get even wider when he saw Evan standing there. He scrambled to sit up. "E-Evan! I, uh, I c-can explain!"

"I-I, um, don't r-really care about what y-you did last night." 

Michael's face went red. "I-it wasn't l-like that, I s-swear."

"M-mom asked me to g-get you guys up. W-we are going out to g-get food soon."

Evan left after that, he felt bad going in there and seeing that. Michael was obviously uncomfortable that he had seen them like that. He didn't want to disturb them more.

Behind the door, he heard shuffling and muffled voices as Jeremy and Michael got ready. That was good, because it meant they were actually getting ready. 

Evan went back into his room, but soon after he heard the others leaving Jeremy's room. "Dude! My clothes are still down there!" Michael.

"I know! I'm coming with you though."

Evan opened his door a little bit. He saw Michael standing at the top of the stairs in his pajamas, and Jeremy running down the hallway in Michael's sweatshirt. Wait. Why was he wearing that? Evan decided that it didn't really matter. 

He glanced at his clock. Maybe he should go downstairs. Jared would be there soon. Evan was walking downstairs as Jeremy and Michael were going back up. "Hey, Evan!" Jeremy said cheerfully. Evan just smiled in response. 

About halfway down the stairs, Evan heard someone pounding on the door. Jared. Evan rushed to the door and opened it, showing Jared mid-knock. "Evan!" Jared exclaimed. "You ready to go?" Even though it was kind of early, Jared seemed almost... peppy.

"O-oh! Um, my m-mom wants us t-to bring my b-brother and his friend," Evan explained.

Jared sighed. "Fine. That's fine. Whatever. I don't really care." Evan wasn't sure how to react, so he just half-smiled awkwardly. "Wait. Since when do you you have a brother?"

"J-Jeremy's my stepbrother. M-my mom got married t-this summer."

"Why didn't you tell me?!"

When Mr. Heere and Evan’s mom got married, Jared was at some summer camp,or something. He _would’ve_ been invited to the wedding, since Heidi and Jared’s mom were friends, except he wasn’t around, so of course he couldn’t go. Evan had expected that Jared’s mom had told him about the marriage, but apparently not, and Jared was usually so busy talking that Evan didn't really have time to say anything. Plus, it wasn't like Evan felt like bringing it up, not that Jared would want to hear about it. Of course, Evan wasn't about to tell Jared that, so he just shrugged.

"Whatever, it's cool, Evan. I don't really care."

"Hey! Who's this?" Jeremy asked from behind Evan. He turned around to see the pair standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"Jared. Jared Kleinman," he introduced himself. "You guys ready to go? I'm starving."

Evan nodded, and they walked out to Jared's car.

The ride there was mostly uneventful. Jared was talking the whole time, but only Evan was really listening, occasionally nodding his head to what he said. Eventually they arrived and quickly got a table. There was an awkward silence between them until after they had gotten their food.

"So," Jared began, "what's the deal with you guys?" he asked, looking at Jeremy and Michael, who were sitting across from him and Evan.

"Huh?" Jeremy looked up from his waffles.

"Jared..." Evan muttered.

"I mean, I haven't seen you around much at school. I guess I have a little, but... I don't know much about you. Evan didn't even mention he knew you until this morning!" Jeremy looked at Evan, raising his brows. "You can understand why I want to know about you guys right? I mean, Evan's my friend and he didn't even tell me about you."

Crap. Why was Jared bringing him into this? Why? What Evan wanted to say was something along the lines of, "This doesn't matter that much Jared," or, "Why do you care?" What Evan actually said was, "W-why don't you matter, Jared?"

Everyone just stared at him for a moment, and Evan felt his face go red. "I didn't m-mean to say that. I, um, was trying t-to say one thing... and t-then I started to say another a-and..." Crap. Were they judging him? They were definitely judging him. What were they thinking? Jared started laughing. Was he laughing at him? Evan hoped he wasn't laughing at him.

"That was probably the closest to something mean you've ever said, Evan," Jared laughed. Evan didn't think it was that funny, but he laughed nervously anyways. After that there was less tension between everyone. Eventually, Jared, Jeremy, and Michael came back to the conversation about themselves though. It was significantly less awkward though. Eventually they got to talking about some game, Apocalypse of the Damned, which apparently Jared played sometimes. They talked about it for awhile, and even though Evan didn't know exactly what it was, it seemed to make them all excited, so he was happy with it. 

Soon enough they were leaving. Jared had parked a little ways away, so they had to walk a bit. They were all talking about something, Evan wasn't quite sure what, when he noticed someone ahead of them. They had shoulder length, dark hair and were wearing a dark sweatshirt and jeans. Evan wasn't sure if it was him or not until they got closer. He had called his name before he realized what he was doing. "Connor?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So, uh... let me know what you think so far! And uh... Actually I don’t really know what else to say. Thank you so much for reading this though!


	7. Omg Ev Answer Me!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor tries to give Evan his number, but Jared is around and starts questioning their friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is kinda shorter than usual, but y’know, it’s fine. Let me know what you think and stay swaggy! Also, I realized that I keep making sorta kinda Be More Chill references for the chapter titles, and I don’t really know why I felt the need to say that other than that I’m basically typing my internal monologue by now. Enjoy!

"Connor?" 

It was a Saturday morning and Connor Murphy decided that his mind was playing tricks on him. Evan Hansen wouldn't be here. Would he? He was just imagining it. After he had written that letter... Connor had been longing to talk to Evan again. He decided he was probably just imagining it.

"What the hell, Evan? Connor? Connor Murphy? Really?" It was Jared Kleinman. That was when he realized Evan actually was there. He would _never_ willingly imagine Jared's voice. Hearing Jared at all was more than enough for Connor. He spun around, quickly spotting Evan and Jared, along with Jeremy and Michael.

"Who's Connor?" Jeremy asked. 

"H-he's um... he's my f-friend," Evan stuttered.

"Really? He's your friend, Evan?" Connor felt himself walking over to them. Shit. He didn't want to see them, unless Evan was alone. 

"Have a problem with that, Kleinman?" He only realized he'd said it aloud a few moments later.

"That's Connor, isn't it?" He heard Michael say quietly. Jeremy nodded. They were clinging onto each other's hands. Connor almost didn't notice, it seemed so natural. Were they...

"Since when are you and Evan friends?"

Shit. If Jared knew they'd only agreed to be friends a few days ago, he'd just say they weren't real friends. Connor panicked. "Well... I, um... We have been friends for a _long_ time," Connor lied. Jared looked at Evan, who had frozen up.

"Oh yeah? Prove it." Shit. Shit! SHIT!

Connor wasn't sure what to say. Jared would totally find out. "D-do you remember that o-one time? With the t-trees?" Evan stammered.

Connor silently thanked Evan. "The orchard?" he said the first thing that came to his mind. His family used to go to this orchard all the time when he and Zoe were younger. 

"Um, yes. Sure. That's the o-one! And we, um... uh..."

"We got ice cream at A La Mode," Connor added, remembering when he used to do that.

"Y-yeah! And, I, um... I b-broke my arm there."

"Oh, yeah." Hopefully that was good enough for Jared.

Jared looked still looked suspicious of them, but nodded and said, "Okay. Well, nice catching up Connor, but we have to go." He grabbed Evan's good arm and pulled him off as he walked away.

"So... you and Evan... How long have you been friends?" Michael asked. Great. They hadn't left yet.

Connor was tired of acting, so he just replied, "A couple days. Don't tell Jared, or he'll say we aren't real friends."

"Oh. Okay."

 They started to walk away, still hand in hand, but Connor called, "Wait!" He ran over to the two of them with a torn piece of paper in his hand. "Can you give this to Evan?" He hastily wrote his number on it and handed it to Jeremy, who nodded. 

He wasn't sure if Evan would text him or call him or... do anything. But Connor really hoped so.

———

It had been ten minutes since Evan had typed the number into his phone. Ten minutes of writing and rewriting texts. Over and over and over. 

 **Evan:** Hi! It's Evan

No one responded for a minute. Evan was nervous... what if this was the wrong number?

 **Evan:** Is this Connor?

 **Connor:** ya its Connor

 **Evan:** Good! How are you?

 **Connor:** uh im good

 **Evan:** That's good. Sorry about what happened with Jared today.

 **Connor:** wha???

 **Connor:** wait why

 **Connor:** its not ur fault dude

 **Evan:** I guess not.

It was nice that Connor didn't blame him for that. That didn't mean Evan didn't feel bad about how Jared treated Connor though.

 **Connor:** maybe we should prove him wrong tho

 **Evan:** What?

 **Connor:** u know

 **Connor:** Jared

 **Evan:** What about him?

 **Connor:** never mind

 **Evan:** No. Really. What about him?

 **Connor:** maybe we should hang out

 **Connor:** or something like that

That was actually a good idea. Evan was thinking about that, but felt awkward bringing it up. He wasn't sure the right way to do that.

 **Evan:** That's a good idea!

 **Connor:** ok what do u wanna do

Evan had thought about this too... In more detail. He had an idea. Not that it was any good. Connor had asked what he wanted to do, and Evan was... curious. This was an awful idea. A really terrible day. He had sent the text before he could think about it twice.

 **Evan:** I was thinking we could go to the orchard.

 **Evan:** If you're ok with that!

He added that after he realized what he'd done. He didn't want Connor to do this if he didn't want to. Connor replied a few seconds later.

 **Connor:** that would be good

 **Connor:** id like that a lot

 **Connor:** Do you wanna go tomorrow or something???

Evan was excited. Connor seemed lonely, and... maybe they could help each other.

 **Evan:** Yeah! That works! Can you pick me up though?

 **Connor:** ya i can ;)

 **Connor:** wait this sounds creepy but where do u live

 **Connor:** cuz i gotta pick u up

Evan typed in his address and sent it, laying down on his bed.

 **Connor:** thank u Evan :)

Evan smiled.

 **Evan:** I can't wait for tomorrow.

 

 

 

 


	8. #KeepConnorintheHouse2k18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy talks to Christine and the rest of his old friends after Michael leaves. Also, Connor is trying to sneak out of the house, and Zoe is very protective™.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So, uh I got another chapter out! Yay! The last chapter was kinda mediocre, but this one is better, I swear. I just didn’t wanna say that I disliked that last chapter during the last chapter because I didn’t want people to be like, “Hmm. Self depricating stuff? See ya later.” Now I’m realizing that I could’ve just put that at the end of the chapter, but y’know, it’s fine. I’m fine.

Jeremy sat slumped on a bean bag in the basement, checking his phone. He didn't really have anything better to do. Besides, as much as he didn't want to, Michael had left his house around an hour ago. Jeremy had been disappointed about this, but if Michael wanted to leave, he would let him. He was trying to remember what exactly had happened last night, but it was all kind of hazy. He had been half asleep when he heard Michael talking to him. He didn't remember what Michael had said, but he remembered that it _was_ Michael. And then he had woken up, his arms wrapped around the other boy.

Jeremy wasn't quite sure how _that_ had happened.

He wasn't sure how he felt about it. He decided he didn't mind. He kind of liked it... a lot. Michael had been awake when he got up, but he was still in bed. Jeremy decided that this meant Michael must've liked it too. At least a little bit. Hopefully.

Jeremy felt himself smiling. And then he realized that he hadn't talked to his friends in awhile. He had been planning to call Christine and talk to her at some point, but he hadn't gotten to it. He decided he might as well talk to her now. It was the best thing he could think of to do.

He called Christine, the phone rang a few times, but quickly stopped. He frowned. Was she busy? he could call her back, he supposed. Suddenly, his phone rang again. Christine was trying to FaceTime him. He smiled, answering quickly.

"Who is that?" someone asked on the other end. He couldn't see who, but it sounded like Rich.

"It's Jeremy," she replied, glancing over her shoulder, "Hey, Jer!" She smiled.

"Um, hey. How's it going?"

"Oh! It's good! We're at my house. Everyone's here! They're sleeping over." Jeremy laughed, remembering some of those sleepovers. They usually played truth or dare, or something similar, which ended with some _weird_ things. 

"Oh. That's cool. How is everyone?"

"They're doing great! I think. Hey guys, Jer wants to know how you're doing," she called.

He suddenly heard lots of muffled noise in the background, including multiple mentions of his name, as the others crowded around Christine's phone.

"Hey, tall-ass." Rich grinned.

"Jeremy!" Brooke exclaimed.

Even if Jeremy couldn't see them in person, it was nice to see their faces for a little bit. "Hey, guys."

"So, we were playing truth or dare," Christine informed him.

"Oh. If you want me to go, I can. Sorry if it's a bad time,” Jeremy apologized.

"No! It's fine. Stay! Everyone's cool okay with that, right?" Christine looked around, somehow smiling wider when everyone agreed with her. "See?"

Jeremy nodded. "Well, um, how are you guys?"

"Well, I auditioned for this show, the other day. I should be finding out how I did soon," Christine answered.

"I'm pretty good," Jake responded simply.

"Yeah. Because we're still dating," Rich smirked. Jeremy smiled, Jake and Rich had started dating near the end of last school year, and it was nice to know that they were still happy together.

Christine laughed. "Speaking of dating..." She shot a glance at Chloe, who blushed intensely.

"Christine!" She whined. "Fine. I'll tell him. Brooke and I are dating," Chloe smiled.

Jeremy was happy for them. Everyone was pretty sure Brooke and Chloe liked each other, especially after they worked out the bumps in their relationship, and everyone was just waiting for the pair to acknowledge each other’s feelings. Knowing it finally happened was a pleasant surprise.

"Cool! I'll tell Michael." Michael would love to know about this. He wished that Michael was with him. He would love to see everyone, and they would love to see him too.

"How is he?" Christine asked.

"Michael? Oh, um, he... I, um-" Jeremy felt his cheeks warming.

"Soooo..." Christine trailed off, "Is he- Wait. Are you two..."

Jeremy was sure his face was red by now. "I-I, um, how did y-you-"

Christine's eyes lit up. "So you _are_ dating! Finally! I knew it!"

Everyone celebrated. They all seemed to be in on this, which somehow made Jeremy blush even more. "H-how... I mean, w-what? Y-you all-"

"I mean, it was kinda obvious," Christine answered, "Plus, after we broke up, Michael and I talked some about... his feelings for you. He didn't think you would like him back, but... Here we are! Finally! I can't believe it! I mean, I can, but it's almost too good to be true."

Jeremy wasn't sure how he felt about this. His friends thought he and Michael would be a cute couple for... He wasn't sure how long. That was _weird._  He supposed it was good that they accepted it so quickly though.

The conversation went on awhile longer before Jake tried to convince him to play truth or dare over the phone and they eventually hung up so they could get back to the game. They said that it was nice to see him and that he should call them again sometime, Jeremy nodding to both.

He smiled, sinking back in the bean bag. He missed his friends a lot, but at least he had Michael. And Evan, he supposed. Evan had grown on him, even though they still didn't talk a lot. He hoped that Evan had called that Connor guy, or something. He had seemed kind of desperate about getting his number to Evan. Oh well.

Jeremy let a warm, fluttery feeling fill his chest as he thought about Michael and the events of the previous night.

———

Zoe was laying on her bed, listening to music on Sunday afternoon. She had her headphones on, as always, because usually Connor complained when she didn't. She wasn't quite sure how Connor was doing. He could be a jerk to her sometimes, but that one day... Well, Connor _had_ been talking to her more often. And not just to complain either. He was actually nice, sometimes. Plus, he was home more often.

Anyways, Zoe was just hanging out, when she noticed someone pass her room. Her door was cracked open, but she could tell someone had passed by. Someone with long, dark hair who was coming from the direction of Connor's room. 

She narrowed her eyes and took one headphone off. Where was he going _this_ time? He had been kind of mellow the past few days, which was strange. She had to admit, she was curious where he could be headed, so she followed.

She snuck down the stairs, making sure to stay quiet. She had spied on Connor before many times, at least, when they were younger. She had tried to follow him a few times more recently, but he had caught her and they had fought. Zoe wasn't keen on arguing with her brother at the moment, so she stayed hidden on the stairs for a moment, before she decided she should see what he was doing.

Connor was... humming to himself? He slung his bag over his shoulder, grabbing his keys. He spun around, sticking his phone in his pocket. His eyes widened a bit and Connor looked almost surprised. It was just for a second, but it was enough for Zoe to notice.

"Where are you going?" She asked, deciding to get straight to the point.

"How long have you been standing there?" Connor snapped.

"Connor? Where are you going?" Zoe asked again.

"Why do you care?" Connor asked, eyeing the door behind Zoe. She quickly moved to block it.

"As much as you think I don't care, I actually don't want you going off to get high... or whatever you do." 

Connor looked confused for a split second, and then uneasy. He gave a nervous laugh. "Y-you actually think that's what I'm doing."

Zoe stood there, looking annoyed. "Connor, I know that's what you're doing. I'm not stupid. You can't fool me. You've done this a few too many times for that."

"Zoe... No."

What? What did he mean _no_? "You're gonna have to do a better job than that if you want to leave."

"Zoe, please... I'm gonna be late." 

"Late? For what? Probably something that you're better off not doing. Connor, please..."

Frustration filled his face and he paused, obviously deciding whether or not to tell her what he was doing. "Zoe... I-I'm going to see someone."

Zoe scoffed. "Yeah? And who's that? You don't exactly have anyone who would want to see yo-"

"I'M GOING TO SEE EVAN!" Connor cried angrily. He must've realized what he'd said, because his face drained of color and suddenly flared red, all in the span of a few seconds.

Zoe was shocked. "I, um. What?"

"I'm seeing Evan. Evan Hansen." Connor said in a small voice.

"Wait. How... When... Why... Evan?" Zoe stuttered.

Connor looked annoyed. "Look, Zoe, I'll tell you later, but right now I _need_ to go."

And before Zoe could stop him, Connor pushed her aside and walked out the door.

 

 


	9. Talk and Take in the View

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor and Evan’s misadventures at the orchard (ft. Accidentally Intrusive Questions).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda like this chapter so, yeah. Just putting that out there. I know I always say this, but let me know what you think! Stay swaggy!

"Hey, Evan?" Connor asked. They were sitting in Connor's car, driving to the orchard as they had planned. Neither of them had talked a ton, Evan supposed neither of them really had anything to say, so this was unexpected. But they had to talk _sometime_. It was better to get talking over with anyways, right?

"Yeah?" Evan responded.

"Sorry I was late." Oh. Right. Connor had been a little late. Evan didn't really mind, but maybe it bothered Connor a little bit.

"Oh, u-um... I don't mind, C-Connor," Evan stuttered. "R-really. I mean it. I-I, um, didn't have any other plans, so..."

"Okay. That's... cool, I guess."

This was awkward. The whole situation. Evan didn't know Connor that well, but he seemed fine. Plus, they had agreed to be friends, and even if Evan wanted to go back now, he felt obligated to at least do this.

"So... Do you like... t-trees?" Evan asked, trying to start a conversation. He realized afterwards how stupid it must've sounded to Connor. _That_ was embarrassing.

It might have just been his imagination, but was Connor... smiling a little bit? "Eh. I don't know. I'm guessing you do? I mean, that was what popped into your head when we were with Jared, right?"

"Oh! Um, yeah. Trees are cool. They make me feel... I don't know. Comforted. That sounds kinda stupid..." Evan responded quietly.

"No, that's not stupid Ev. Can I call you Ev? I'm gonna call you Ev," Connor said. "But really," he added, "I get it. It's cool. Now that you mention it, trees are kinda nice, I guess."

Evan felt himself smiling a little bit. He didn't know Connor well, but he had seen Connor around other people. Plus, if he was being nicer to Evan than when they'd met... Maybe Connor really did want to be his friend. 

"Well... um, I... Is this it?" Evan asked, as Connor parked the car. He was trying to make a better conversation than one about trees (although he did love trees, not everyone shared his enthusiasm for them), so he was glad that Connor stoped when he did.

"Yep." Connor stepped out of the car, running a hand through his hair. "I kinda forgot about this place. Haven't been here in forever. It's weird because it had to shut down a few years ago, so its really... different."

Evan stared at the orchard, taking in the scene a little bit at a time. Old apple trees with gnarled roots were lined up in what probably used to be neat rows, but over time just looked like a mess, smaller trees beginning to grow here and there. The trees seemed to go on for forever, not only in the fact that there were so many trees everywhere, but some of them had grown very tall. They would be good climbing trees. 

Evan shuddered, thinking about what had happened last time he'd climbed a tree. He decided that he wouldn't be climbing any trees anytime soon. Plus, it wasn't like he could with his broken arm. He decided that would be his excuse if Connor asked him to climb any trees. It seemed easy enough. No explanation involved. People with broken arms probably shouldn't be climbing trees.

It took Evan a moment to realize that Connor had grabbed his hand. He looked at Connor's face. He looked almost excited. "C'mon, Ev!" Connor grinned, and then he took off through the trees, pulling Evan along with him.

Evan was shocked and then thrilled and then panicked, all in the span of a few moments. Connor Murphy was running him through some abandoned apple orchard in the middle of nowhere. What if he tripped? He could hurt his broken arm even more! Or worse, maybe he could break his other arm! What was he thinking? Evan was nervous, but he also didn't want to stop. He wasn't quite sure why. If they had stopped, or at least walked, Evan might have noticed how the light filtered through the canopy of leaves, or how small, red apples still grew on some of the trees, or how Connor looked truly happy for once. But they didn't stop.

Maybe if they had slowed down, Evan would've realized that Connor was leading him somewhere, but he was too startled to ask. Connor sprinted through the maze of trees, still grasping Evan's hand, when Evan _did_ realize something. They had almost made it out of the trees. How long had they been running? Evan wasn't quite sure. it didn't _seem_ like it had been long, but... Who knew?

They suddenly burst into a little grassy field, surrounded on all sides by the apple trees. Evan smiled. It was beautiful. It looked so... peaceful. Evan loved nature, because you didn't need to be with people to enjoy it. And this was... just, incredible! He felt like he could stay there forever. But Evan could only take it in for a few moments.

And then they fell. Evan wasn't sure if he or Connor had tripped, but one of them had, dragging the other one down with them. Evan realized that there was a good chance he could hurt his arm more as he fell, but was helpless to do anything about it. His eyes widened. And then they hit the ground.

The two boys just lay there for a few moments. Neither one saying anything. Evan could still feel his arm. Not that he thought he wouldn't be able to, but in the worst possible scenario... Anyways, Evan could feel his arm, which wasn't in pain. He sighed in relief. And then Connor started laughing. Evan wasn't sure if it was a nervous laugh or if Connor was laughing at him or if it was a real, genuine laugh about what had happened, but he felt himself start laughing too.

And that's how they stayed for awhile. Two friends laying in a heap on the ground in the middle of an abandoned orchard, laughing. Neither one was quite sure why the other was laughing, but they decided that it couldn't be a bad thing. 

Evan's smile grew. Maybe being friends with Connor Murphy wouldn't be such a bad thing.

———

Connor and Evan had moved to the middle of the field, just talking and taking in the view. They laid on the ground, staring at the sky, which was a bright shade of blue. Fluffy white clouds passed in and out of view, and the sun shone brightly on them. 

Connor sighed happily. This was the best time he'd had in awhile. "So," he began, "How's life?" Connor asked, not thinking of anything better to say.

"G-good," Evan answered simply.

"Oh. Um. That's good." Shit. What was he supposed to say? "Uh, so what's the deal with Jared?" Wait. Oh, shit. That probably wasn't the best thing to say...

Evan looked a little uncomfortable, but he answered Connor anyways. "Well, um, he's a family friend. I mean, we're kinda f-friends, but... He's nice once you get to know him."

Connor scoffed, "Jared Kleinman? Nice? Yeah right."

"No! Really! Jared is fine. He's not a bad guy, I swear!" Evan seemed very insistent on sticking up for Jared. Connor wasn't quite sure why.

"Oh, really?" Connor asked.

"Yeah!" Evan shot back. "I think you just scare him a little," Evan added quietly.

"How?" Connor asked, more curious than anything.

"Well, I think you kinda freak him out. Not to be mean! But you make him uncomfortable, so he just makes fun of you. It makes him feel like you can't touch him."

Well. That was a new one. Connor laughed a little. "That is so stupid! If I wanted to, I could beat him up anyways. That's not gonna protect him."

Evan laughed nervously for a few seconds before stopping. "You're not going to though. Right?"

Connor went silent. "No. I won't Ev. If you don't want me to, I won't." He meant it. 

"O-okay. How's Zoe?"

Oh. Right. Connor had almost forgotten. Zoe. How did he know that this wasn't just some trick Evan was doing to get closer to her? Shit. "I, uh..."

"We don't have to talk about her if you don't want to!" Evan quickly interjected. "Sorry, I wasn't sure what else to ask, and it seemed pretty reasonable. I mean, she's your sister. And I just thought that maybe yo-" 

Evan was speaking so fast that Connor could barely understand what he was saying. He seemed to be panicking. Shit! What could he say? He had to say something. Anything! "How did you break your arm?"

Evan stopped talking. He looked nervous. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I-I, um... I fell from a tree."

"Oh? You must've been pretty high up. Or did you just land badly?"

"I-I... Climbed up almost to the top. As high as I could go. It was... incredible. I felt like I could touch the sky. And then I fell and I broke my arm. A-and I just laid there on the ground for a bit, waiting for someone to come find me. Waiting for someone to help me. But no one came..." Evan's voice faded into silence. Well, almost silence. Connor could hear the other boy sniffling. Wait. Was Evan crying? Shit! He was, wasn't he?

Connor sat up and turned towards Evan, who had also apperently sat up at some point. The other boy was hugging his knees to his chest, crying softly. Oh god. That must've been traumatizing for Evan, waiting and waiting for someone to help him and no one coming. The thought of Evan laying there on the ground with a broken arm, waiting for nothing, made Connor feel sick.

"I, um... I'm so sorry, Ev. That must've been awful. I wish I had been there to help you." Connor had wrapped his arms around Evan in an awkward hug before he realized what he was doing.

Evan's crying died down slightly. 

"And, Ev? If you ever fall again, I'll come find you." Connor knew he meant it. He meant it more than he meant anything. If anything bad happened to Evan Hansen, he would be there to help him. No matter what. Evan leaned into Connor's hug, causing Connor to blush slightly.

"Thank you," Evan whispered, "Thank you, Connor." Tears still dripped from his eyes.

So they sat like that for awhile. Connor's arms wrapped loosely around Evan, who was leaning into the other boy's embrace, in the middle of a field in an abandoned apple orchard. Neither one said much more after that, they knew that the silence wasn't bad. That if they had something to say, the other would listen, no matter what. 

And that's what they did. They sat and watched the sky. And even as the world passed by, they felt like this could go on for forever.

 


	10. Jared Contemplates Fake Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy fears the squip might be back, and Jared starts to think that his friends might be hiding things from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey. So, it’s been awhile since I last posted, and I’m sorry about that, but another one’s out now! Yay! But, that’s it for now. Idk what else to say...

_The hallway in the school was empty, and eerily quiet. "Jeremy Heere," a voice called. Jeremy felt dread pooling in his stomach as he slowly turned around. He would recognize that voice anywhere. His squip stood there, hands on his hips, looking impatient._

_Jeremy felt like he should say something, but he had no idea what. He supposed the squip could tell what he was thinking anyways. Shit. SHIT! He felt himself breathing heavily, hyperventilating. He was frozen in panic. What should he do? What should he-_

_"Jer?" Jeremy turned around to see Michael standing there smiling._

_"Michael!" Jeremy called. At least Michael was with him. He still had some Mountain Dew Red left over, just in case. He could help him! Suddenly Michael's face darkened. He wasn't looking at Jeremy, but rather behind him. But the only thing behind Jeremy was... Oh, shit. Wait, could Michael even see-_

_"Jeremy. W-why... did you get another squip?" Michael's voice was filled with pain. It made Jeremy feel sick. "I-I thought I was good enough for you..." Michael's hands were clenched in tight fists, tears flooded his eyes. "I THOUGHT I WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU, JEREMY!" He yelled, and he turned and ran off._

_"Michael! MICHAEL!" Jeremy cried. He turned back to the squip, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" How was the squip even back? Oh god. What had he done? When had he... He didn't want answers, he just wanted Michael. So Jeremy took off running._

_"MICHAEL! WAIT COME BACK! MICHAEL!" He called, voice aching. The hallway seemed to stretch on forever. Suddenly he saw Michael standing there, perfectly still, staring at him. As he got closer, he could make out the tears running down the other boy's cheeks. "Michael..." Jeremy said in a hushed tone._

_"So, Jeremiah," Michael began, sneering his name. His full name. Michael knew he hated his full name. "What's up with the squip? Want to go running back to Christine? Or is it that Zoe girl? Or someone else completely? I don't even know with you anymore." Venom filled his words, and it made Jeremy's heart ache._

_"Michael, I-" Jeremy began._

_"NO! You don't get it! This isn't the first time you've cast me out, and it sure as hell isn't the last time. So that's it. We're done Jeremy. This time I'm the one giving you up. It's better that way. We both know that. No more best friends. No more player two. No more boyfriends. I'm sorry that you couldn't stop being an inconsiderate asshole." And then he turned and walked away._

_Jermey tried to follow, but his feet wouldn't move. "Michael! MICHAEL!" He screamed, voice cracking. If he could explain... "MICHAEL!" he screamed again. If he could explain it all to Michael... He had no idea how the squip was back. He loved Michael. A lot. He felt tears running down his face. If he could just explain..._

_As Michael faded from view, the squip placed a hand on Jeremy's shoulder. "It's for the best, Jeremy."_

Jeremy sat bolt upright in bed. He was drenched in sweat, and tears ran down his cheeks. It was just a dream. Just a dream. A terrifying dream. He fumbled around, trying to find his phone.

He needed to talk to someone. The phone rang once. Twice. Three times. "Hello? Jer? It's late, man, what's up?" Michael asked tierdly. Jeremy had obviously woken him up. It was such a relief to hear his voice that he didn't even really care.

"C-can you c-come over? P-please. N-now. Please." Jeremy forced out.

"Jer? What's wrong? I'm coming over. Is the door unlocked?" Michael asked nervously.

Jeremy nodded, before realizing that Michael couldn't hear him nodding. "Y-yeah," he replied.

"Okay. Be there soon." Michael hung up. 

Jeremy sat there, frozen in his bed, the only noise his heavy breathing and his crying. He wasn't sure how long it had been when Michael finally came into his room. He felt like he had been waiting forever, but it also seemed like no time had passed. 

He looked up at Michael and started crying harder. He was wearing his sweatshirt and a pair of old, flannel pajama pants. Michael pressed a kiss to Jeremy's forehead before sitting down on the bed. He wrapped his arms around Jeremy, who leaned into his touch, sobbing into Michael's shoulder. "It's okay. You're okay, Jer. It's gonna be okay," Michael whispered, rubbing Jeremy's back.

Jeremy hugged him back tightly. He tried to speak, but couldn't say anything, just cry. 

"Jer, what happened?" Michael asked softly.

"A-are you really here?" Jeremy questioned nervously. What if this was just another dream? 

"Yeah. I'm here." Michael replied. "Did something happen?"

"I-I... had a nightmare. About the s-squip. And you. And y-you h-hated me." Jeremy cried harder after finishing his explanation, collapsing into Michael's arms.

"Jer..." Michael trailed off. "I could never hate you." Jeremy must've still seemed skeptical, because Michael cupped his hands around Jeremy's face and looked him straight in his eyes. "I love you Jeremy." And then he kissed him. Jeremy melted into the kiss. It felt so good. And Michael didn't hate him. Jeremy ran his hand through Michael's hair as the other boy deepened the kiss further. Jeremy moaned softly. 

Jeremy wasn't quite sure how long it lasted, he just knew that he didn't want it to stop. Once they did finish, Jeremy met Michael's eyes and pulled them back together. And then they were kissing again. The kiss was gentle, yet passionate. Jeremy wished he could do this forever. Once it ended, he sighed and wiped his eyes.

Michael stood up slowly. "Well, you seem to be feeling a little better. It's kinda late. Do you want me to go or-"

"Stay." Jeremy said quickly. "Please, Michael. Stay." 

Michael looked a little nervous. "We have school tomorrow. Are you sure you want me to-"

"You don't want me to have another nightmare, do you?" Jeremy asked. "Please, Michael." He added.

Michael didn't need much convincing. "Okay." He sat back down while Jeremy pulled the blankets back over himself. Michael sat there for a moment as Jeremy got comfortable, seemingly lost in thought.

"You can get in if you want." Jeremy said quietly.

It must've snapped Michael out of whatever thought he was having, because he replied, "Oh! Right!" Jeremy was sure that if it weren't so dark, he would see Michael blushing. And then he laid down.

Jeremy scooted closer to Michael, so his head was resting on the other boy's chest. Michael seemed not to mind, he sighed happily and started gently playing with Jeremy's hair. Jeremy felt himself smiling a little as he drifted towards sleep.

Michael was here.

Michael didn't hate him.

Michael would never hate him.

Michael loved him.

———

"Evan. Evan? Evaaaaaaan? EVAN!" Jared was frantically waving his hand in front of Evan's face. He had been kinda... spaced out today. More than usual.

"Huh?" Evan finally looked up from his lunch, which he had been picking at slowly.

"Whatcha thinking about?"

Evan blushed lightly. "Well, I, um..."

"You what?"

"Um... this morning... I-"

"Hey, guys!" Alana interrupted, walking towards the table. Oh well. Jared would find out sooner or later. Besides, Evan _had_ been acting weird lately. He said he was friends with _Connor_. Connor Murphy! Shit. What if he was thinking about Connor, or something like that? Shit. Shit SHIT! "Jared, are you ready for the test?"

"Wait. What test?" He said in fake surprise.

"The math test! You mean, you didn't study?" She seemed kind of annoyed with Jared. Disappointed, but not surprised. She usually would go around telling him to study for this, or practice that. Jared didn't mind. It kept him on track.

Jared burst out laughing. "Of course I studied! You've been telling me to for the past week!"

Alana sighed. "Look Jared. If you want to keep going on and on about how you 'didn't study', trying to get me to freak out, it won't work. You've done it one too many times for that. It was a mediocre joke the first time. Just imagine how it is now." She glared at him. Evan watched all of this in silence, still picking at his food.

"Hey, uh, can I sit here?" Jared looked behind him to see Zoe Murphy standing there. Wait. Why did Zoe Murphy even want to sit with them? It wasn't like any of them were her friends or anything.

Jared raised an eyebrow and glanced from Evan to Alana, seeing how they would respond. "Oh. Sure. That's fine," Alana said confidently.

"Are you sure it's fi-"

"Jared!" Evan hissed under his breath. Jared knew Evan had a crush on Zoe at one point. He also happened to know that he had given up on it not too long ago.

"Fine. Whatever." Jared slumped back in his chair.

Alana and Zoe quickly sparked up a conversation. What it was about, Jared didn't know. He didn't really care either. He was busy thinking about Evan, trying to figure out what exactly it was that Evan wouldn't tell him.

After thinking about it for what seemed like forever, but was actually closer to three minutes, Jared figured he would just ask Evan. "So, Evan..." Evan turned to look at him nervously. "We never finished our conversation earlier." Evan's face went red.

"I-I'll tell you l-later," he stammered. _That_ wasn't a good sign. At least Evan was willing to tell him sooner or later. Evan may have been very quiet most of the time, but he was always nice to Jared. If Jared was being honest, Evan was probably his closest friend. He didn't like the idea that he would spend a ton of time with Connor and not even tell him. Oh god. What did he and Connor even do most of the time? Did they just hang out, go to that orchard they mentioned, or was it something else? Were they... best friends? Jared didn't like the concept of anyone being Evan's best friend except for himself.

"J-Jared?" Evan asked. 

"What?" Jared snapped.

"I-I, um... You looked kind of upset. I can tell you now, I guess. If you want." 

"Whatever." Jared wanted to know. He really did. But he felt weird outright saying that.

Evan must've been able to tell though, because he started talking quietly to him. "Uh, you remember Jeremy, right? M-my brother. I probably shouldn't be telling you this. W-why am I telling you this? But, uh, he, uh... My mom asked me t-to wake him up... and I-I saw him-"

Evan cut himself off midsentence and stared at something. He looked shocked. Jared turned around to see what it was. He had to admit, he didn't see it coming either. Zoe had kissed Alana, and was blushing... a lot. They hadn't made out or anything. But they did kiss. On the lips. Jared knew that girls would do some weird stuff if they were close, but he was pretty sure kissing wasn't one of those things. Definitely sure. Were they...

"Zoe?" A voice asked. It was Connor. Shit. Jared hated Connor. He kinda freaked him out. Connor was just a weird guy, and Jared wasn't really sure what to think of him. Plus, at the beginning of the school year, he was a jerk to Evan. He wasn't sure how they could be friends. Evan Hansen, the nicest, quietest guy in the school and Connor Murphy, the long-haired, almost-emo asshole.

Zoe looked uncomfortable that Connor had come over. He had probably seen it too. "Sit down, Connor," she said quickly. "Now." Connor sat down right next to Evan. Great. Now Evan would never finish his story.

"Hey, Ev," Connor said quietly. It was so quiet, Jared almost didn't hear, but he was listening closely. He didn't want anything Connor said to Evan to be unnoticed. Evan smiled a little too. Why? He and Evan were best friends, right? Connor was just some random guy, right? Oh god. Why Connor Murphy of all people? "Uh, Zoe? What was that?" Connor asked, louder.

"Alana's my girlfriend, not that you would care. You didn't even ask. Too busy sneaking out to see Evan, I guess." _WHAT_? Connor went pale, and Evan blushed intensely. Jared was shocked about everything. That Alana and Zoe were dating. That Evan and Connor were... Well, he wasn't quite sure what they were doing, but he didn't like it.

"Since when are you two a thing?" Jared asked Alana. "Why didn't you tell us?"

Alana sighed. "Jared, we're just acquaintances. Remember? It's not like I tell you guys _everything_." Oh right. According to Alana, everyone was an 'acquaintance', whatever that meant. At least, everyone but Zoe.

_"_ But you guys _never_ hang out!" Jared pointed out.

"You mean, _you guys_ don't hang out with us _,_ " Zoe amended. She had a point. People could be friends behind other people's backs. They could be more than friends, without anyone ever knowing. Everyone had secrets apparently. Secrets that they didn't want Jared to know.

The thought made Jared feel sick.

 


	11. Jeremy at the Psychiatrist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy consults Evan about his nightmares. The next day, he and Michael begin to talk to Evan’s friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah. It’s been a hot second since I last posted. Better later than never though, am I right? But I mean, it’s here now, so... Let me know what you think!

**“** Hey Evan?" Jeremy poked his head into Evan's room.

"Yeah?" Evan looked up from his computer. "Y-you can come in, if you want."

Jeremy stepped in awkwardly. Things had been awkward between them since that morning, when Evan went into Jeremy's room and saw him and Michael sleeping together. Evan didn't even know how Michael had gotten there! He wasn't there last night, and then in the morning, he was! How did that happen? He knew Jeremy was a little embarrassed about the whole situation. Evan didn't really care what Jeremy did, as long as something bad didn't happen.

”Uh, can we talk?” Jeremy asked.

Jeremy sat down on the bed next to Evan, fidgeting with the sleeve of his dark blue sweater. "I-I don't really care what happened with Michael last night," Evan said quietly. Jeremy's whole face went red. Wait. Was that not what he wanted to talk about? Oh god. This was _so_ embarrassing. "I'M SORRY I DIDN'T MEAN TO BRING IT UP I JUST THOUGHT YOU WERE ABOUT TO, AND-"Evan talked so fast, Jeremy could barely understand what he was saying. He got the basic idea of it though.

"No. No! It's fine. Really." Was it though? Was it really? Evan was still skeptical. "I... Are you ever, like, really scared of anything?" Yes. Evan nodded slowly, not sure where this was going. "Like, do you have nightmares, or anything?" Oh.

Evan shook his head. "I-I mean, I'm scared of some stuff. A lot. But I haven't had nightmares or anything."

"L-last night, I had a dream about the squip. And Michael. It was... terrifying. Michael hated me, and..." Jeremy seemed close to tears just talking about it. Evan wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. 

"I-I, um, I'm sorry." Wait. That sounded stupid. It was a borderline expectation that Evan didn't want Jeremy to have nightmares, right? He had no idea. It wasn’t like he had ever had a brother before. It was just confusing, how were you supposed to even-

"N-no. It's not your fault." It wasn't, but that didn't mean Evan couldn't still feel bad about it. 

"W-were the nightmares why Michael..."

"Yes." Jeremy quickly cut him off, embarrassed enough that Evan had already brought it up once. “ Yeah... I called him, and he just... came."

He literally called Michael and he had just... rushed over? What time would that have been? Pretty early, Evan was sure. Michael was... Evan wasn't sure what the best word was, but he knew he didn't have anyone in his life that he could call in the middle of the night and have rush over. Probably.

This was a weird conversation. Why were they talking about this? Couldn't they be talking about anything else? He needed to get this over with. "Well... I-I mean, you have Michael. A-and, um, he   really... cares for you. Yeah. H-he really l-loves you. A-and, y'know, I-I'm here for you. Even if he's not."

Jeremy smiled a little. "Thanks," he said quietly.

"A-and even when the dark comes crashing through... y-you will be found."

"That was oddly poetic," Jeremy remarked. Evan felt himself smile a little.

"I-I just meant that people are t-there for you. P-people care. About you. They r-really do. A-and they want to h-help you."

Jeremy's face darkened a little, "B-but the squip... Even if they wanted to, no one really knows about it. H-how could they help me? If it did c-come back?" Tears threatened to spill from his eyes. 

This wasn't good. This was the opposite of good. This was most definitely _NOT_ what Evan was trying to do. "B-but it got shut off, right?"

Jeremy nodded, wiping his eyes. "Still. W-what if it came back on?"

"Does it seem like it's back?"

"N-no... but-"

"It's okay. Y-you're gonna be fine. A-as long as you don't go seeking out any more s-squips..."

Jeremy immediately replied, "NEVER AGAIN."

"You'll be fine," Evan finished. "A-and if it does come back... you have Michael. And m-me. And mom and dad. A-and my friends would help. Probably. You'd like them, I think. They're nice."

Jeremy smiled nervously, still a little worried, but more confident that he'd be okay.

The two just sat there for a moment, neither one really sure what to say. Eventually it was Jeremy who broke the silence. Evan was glad. He didn't want to be the one to do it. "Well... I, uh, thanks, Evan. For everything."

And then he got up and left. And Evan was left in silence again, but this time he was alone. That went... not completely awful. That was good enough for Evan.

He sighed and laid back on his bed. Evan hoped Jeremy would be okay.

———

"Hey, uh, can we sit here?" Jeremy stood by a table in the cafeteria, which Evan's friends were crowded around. Michael was with him, of course. They hadn't met many people at school so far, at least, not many good people. But they had each other, which helped. And Evan _had_ implied that he could meet his friends. Maybe this was weird. Was it weird to be friends with your brothers friends? Jeremy wasn't quite sure. He'd never had a brother before.

"Uh, yeah," Jared responded, looking up at them. "Guys, these are Jeremy and Michael. Jeremy is Evan's brother," he explained. Zoe nodded, but some girl with glasses, Jeremy didn't know her name, looked unsure about them.

"So, you're Evan's brother?" She asked. Jeremy nodded. Now that they were talking about Evan, Jeremy noticed that Evan wasn't at the table yet. "I'm Alana, by the way," she added.

Alana shot Zoe a glance and Zoe responded, "They're cool, Alana. Michael is in my history class. Right?" 

"Yep." Michael responded simply. He took a long sip of his slushie.

"Wait, wait, wait. You have a _slushie_?" Jared asked. "Jealous." He said jokingly.

Jeremy smiled, Jared was nice enough to them when they met before. He seemed like a good guy. Plus, he played Apocalypse of the Damned, which was an added benefit. Michael had said that this meant Jared had good taste, at least in games. Jeremy had laughed, but agreed with him.

"Jared, if you really wanted a slushie, you would've gotten one," Alana said matter-of-factly. 

"Maybe he just realized he wanted one when he saw it," Zoe replied. "I mean, that happens to me a lot. I forget the last time I had a slushie, but they're pretty good. Great. Now I want one too. Where did you even get that?"

"Seven Eleven," Michael said at the same time as Connor.

"Wait. Why do you know that?" Zoe asked. Connor had been sitting there quietly the entire time. Jeremy hadn't really noticed him. Last time he had seen Connor, he had asked him to give Evan his number. He wondered if they had ever started texting, or something.

"I was there this morning. I saw him," Connor explained. Michael nodded, still drinking the slushie.

"Why were you even at Seven Eleven this morning?" Zoe asked in surprise.

"Did you just run into him there, or did you two go together? Like some weird 'we're best friends but never hang out in school' thing. Or were you stalking him? That would be creepy. Like, _really_ creepy," Jared thought aloud.

Jeremy agreed, stalking people was creepy. Especially people stalking his boyfriend. That was even worse. Michael was _his_ boyfriend, and he wasn't about to give him up to some random person. Or any person for that matter. Not that Connor was actually stalking him. But still. Wait. Was he jealous that Connor was at Seven Eleven at the same time as Michael? Oh god. That was stupid. It wasn't like Michael would cheat on him or anything. Especially not with someone he barely knew. But it was weird being jealous of someone like this, without any real reason. Jeremy had never felt like that before.

"H-hey guys." Evan sat down in between Connor and Jared, who were glaring at each other. "What'd I miss?"

"Nothing much," Zoe said, no doubt trying to keep Jared and Connor from fighting. "Where were you?"

"Oh, uh, my science class got let out late," Evan replied.

"That sucks," Zoe said. After that, there was an awkward silence for awhile. Evan's friends seemed nice enough. At least, it was better than sitting anywhere else. Jeremy had decided that there was probably something going on between Connor and Jared though. They seemed not to get along the best. Maybe that was just a mixture of Jared's jokes and Connor's seriousness, but still.

"So... Why were you at Seven Eleven this morning?" Jared questioned finally. Jeremy knew it was probably a bad idea to continue with this conversation, but he had to admit he was curious.

"I just was," Connor said, not meeting Jared's eyes.

"Okaaaaaay," Jared said, stretching out the word. "No, but really, why? Michael, did you see what he was doing? Or did he go with you or something?"

"Uh, I don't know. I mean, I saw him, but we didn't go together or anything," Michael looked uncomfortable that he was being dragged into this. Evan just looked confused about the whole conversation.

"Uh, Jared? Can we just stop talking about this?" Zoe asked, picking up on the tension in the group. Jeremy nodded in agreement.

"Fine. Whatever." Jared sighed and went back to eating his sandwich.

It was a few minutes later when Jeremy realized that Michael had pulled his headphones over his ears, listening to some music. Sometimes when he was stressed or nervous, Michael would do that, trying to block other things out.

Jeremy scooted his chair closer to Michael's and leaned his head on his shoulder. He glanced up to see Michael blushing lightly. "What are you listening to?" Jeremy asked.

"Nothing much," Michael replied, sliding his headphones off.

"You can keep listening if you wa-"

"Jer. I'm fine. Really. Besides, I like listening to you better." He said the last part quiet enough that only Jeremy could hear. Jeremy felt his face go red.

"Uh, if you don't mind me asking, are you two-“ Alana began.

"Dating? Yeah," Michael answered. Jeremy didn't think his face could get any more red, but somehow it did. He liked hearing Michael say it. That they were together.

“I was going to ask if you two were friends before you transferred schools, but okay,” Alana replied. 

"Really?" Jared asked. Michael nodded. "Why is everyone dating all of a sudden?"

"Do you have a problem with that Jared?" Zoe asked, glaring at him.

"No! I'm just observing that everyone's getting together all of a sudden." Jared seemed almost... jealous.

"Good," Zoe replied.

Eventually, it was time to go to class. "Wait! Michael!" Jeremy called. 

Michael turned around, "Yeah?"

"Are we still gonna hang out tonight?"

"Oh! Totally! Well, uh, see you then, I guess!" Michael smiled at him before walking off to class.

Jeremy couldn't wait to see him later.

 

 


	12. Zoe is (trying to be) a Good Sibling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe steals Connor’s phone to talk to Evan. Oh, and enter the sleepover (IT’S NOT CLICHE! OKAY!) Also we have sibling bonding time with the Murphys (you’re welcome.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. The funny thing is, I have this all written, but I’m really bad about posting it. So here’s another chapter. I’m sorry for the weird updating schedual. RIP in peace.

"Connor!" Zoe called, causing him to spin around and glare at her.

"What?" He yelled back in annoyance. She ran towards him, holding tightly onto the straps of her backpack.

"You're driving me home today," Zoe said matter-of-factly. 

He sighed and rolled his eyes a little, "Fine. Whatever."

Zoe walked right up next to him, so they would be walking side by side. Connor frowned and sped up. Not a lot, but enough that Zoe noticed. She wasn't sure if he'd meant to do it, so she just walked a little faster. A few seconds later, Connor started walking even faster. Zoe wasn't sure what exactly he was trying to accomplish by doing this, but whatever it was, she wasn't just about to let him win. Was he trying to avoid her? That was stupid, they were going to the same car anyways. Unless he was trying to abandon her. She'd need to have a word with him about that. Maybe Alana could pick her up. Or... maybe he was meeting someone. Evan. Maybe he was meeting Evan Hansen again.

Zoe picked up her pace, starting to jog towards the car. Connor glanced over at her and started running. And then Zoe started all out sprinting towards the car in an attempt to beat Connor. She quickly passed him, and a few seconds later, he started sprinting too. She didn't care what happened, but she needed to win. As long as she beat Connor, she would be fine. Zoe leapt off the sidewalk into the parking lot, almost to the car. A few seconds later, Connor passed her at full speed, grinning wildly. 

As Connor got closer to the car, he didn't let up. Zoe was confused, did he mean to do that? Where was he going? It must've been a mistake, because a few seconds later, Connor started to slow down, but it was too late. He slammed into the car door with a thud and fell to the ground.

"Owwwwwwww," he moaned. Zoe burst out laughing. She didn't win, but this was almost worth it. In fact, maybe it _was_ worth it. She jogged the rest of the way to the car.

"Oh my god. Are you okay?" She got out in between laughs.

Connor picked himself up off the ground, dusting off his clothes a little bit. "Yeah. I'm fine." He unlocked the car and climbed in the front seat, wincing a little bit. He obviously hurt himself a little, but he wasn't bleeding or anything, which was good.

"So... What was that all about?" Zoe asked as she sat down.

"What was _what_ about?" Connor asked smirking.

"Oh, I don’t know, maybe when you SPRINTED STRAIGHT INTO THE FRICKIN’ CAR DOOR AND COLLAPSED ON THE GROUND."

"Way to be subtle," Connor commented.

"Shut up!" Zoe shot back, but she was smiling. They were arguing (kind of) but it wasn't like their other arguments. This one was more... good natured, if an argument can even _be_ good natured. The point is, Zoe decided that Connor wasn't mad at her this time, and that was what counted. "But really though, what was that about?"

"I thought Alana was taking you home."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You weren't going to even tell me about her? What is all this about Zoe?" He snapped.

Zoe was stunned. " _Me_? _I'm_ the problem? Sorry, Connor, but like I said before, you didn't ask about Alana. And why would you even care? It's not like you care about anything else in my life! And you never tell me anything! If you want me to tell you stuff, you gotta tell _me_ stuff, Connor. That's how trust works. I don't even know where you are half the time! Maybe you're in your room, or maybe you're smoking weed in some dark corner, or maybe you're making out with Evan Hansen, no one knows. So don't even start about how _I_ don't tell _you_ anything."

Connor's face went red, and he sat there silently, in shock, for a moment. "I-I... we're just friends."

"What?"

His face heated up even more and when he answered Zoe his voice was in a near whisper, "I'm not making out with Evan Hansen. We're just friends. At least he wants to be..."

Zoe snorted. "You're just friends? Why do you hang out in secret all the time then?"

It was Connor's turn to be upset. "This is why Zoe! Because if people knew we hung out then they would say what you're saying right now. Plus, I know people don't like me, I see how they look at me, Zoe. If people knew Evan was friends with me... I don't want that for him."

"Connor..."

"Also, didn't you and Alana hang out in secret for a long time?"

Zoe blushed, "Connor!"

"You did though, didn't you?"

Zoe nodded reluctantly. "Look, Connor, you've been sitting with us and no one seems to care, right? Evan's gonna be fine. If he's friends with you, that's not their problem. He's your friend because he wants to be, Connor."

He smiled at Zoe, for the first time in awhile.

"But... you do like Evan, right?"

Connor's face flared red, but he nodded slowly. "Y-yeah. I do. I really do." It was then that an idea popped into Zoe's head. Her eyes lit up, and a mischievous grin spread across her face. "Oh no. What is it?" Connor asked reluctantly.

"I have an idea."

"I can tell."

"Look, how about we have everyone over? Well, not everyone, but our friends. Y'know, Alana and Evan and Jared and Jeremy and Michael. And we can all just hang out. Maybe they can sleep over! And if they sleep over..." Zoe wiggled her eyebrows.

"NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT."

"Okay. Let me rephrase that: I'm having everyone over, and they'll all want to hang out with you. Especially Evan. But you won't want to miss a chance to hang out with Evan, will you? I don't think so."

"THIS IS BLACKMAIL."

"It's really not. I'm trying to help you, Connor. It'll be fun, I swear!"

"Don't do it!"

"Connor. I'm gonna do it. What do you have to lose?"

"My image!"

"I'm doing it. Do you have Evan's number? Wait. I know you do. Gimme one second..." Zoe reached in her backpack and grabbed out Connor's phone.

"WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT?"

"It fell on the ground when you rammed into the car door."

"So now it's blackmail _and_ thievery!"

"Don't be so dramatic." Zoe typed in his password.

"How do you know my password?"

"Connor. I've known it for _forever_. Plus, it's not even that good! 1111 is an awful password."

Connor stared at her, defeated.

"Let's see here. Ah! Evan! Wow, your most recent conversation, too! Very nice. Really shows your priorities."

"Give me that!" Connor reached across the seat for his phone, but Zoe kept it out of his reach.

"Done!" She quickly let him have it, knowing it was too late for him to do any damage. the text was already sent.

**Connor:** heyyyy

**Connor:** we're having some people over tomorrow night

**Connor:** like Jared and Alana and stuff

**Connor:** wanna come???

**Connor:** Jeremy and Michael can come too

Connor read all of this while blushing intensely. "ZOE!" He hissed.

"Look! He already responded!" Zoe said, pointing to a new message at the bottom of the screen.

**Evan:** Sure! I'd love to! See you then

Zoe grinned. Mission accomplished.

———

"T-this is your house?" Evan was sitting in the passenger seat of Connor's car. He had asked if Connor could drive him there after school, and Connor had quickly agreed. Connor had pulled up to a nice looking, big house, and was preparing to park.

"Yeah. It is. I bet it's kinda weird, isn't it? Cause I always go to your house to pick you up, but you never come here. I mean, you're here now, but still," Connor answered.

"It's... big," Evan said.

Connor smiled slightly. "Yep. It is, isn't it?"

"Sorry. I bet you get that a lot. People saying your house is big. And it is, but it's not _super_ big. I mean, its nice, but not, like, a mansion or anything. But its really nice. A great house, I'm sure! 10/10 for high quality houses. An absolutely wonderful home.  A really, _really,_ nice, expensive house." Connor glanced at him awkwardly. "OH! WAIT! I'm rambling aren't I? I’M SORRY THATS SO ANNOYING. I DIDNT MEAN TO I JUST GOT DISTRACTED AND NERVOUS AND STUFF. AND I DIDNT MEAN TO SAY THAT EITHER. CRAP. I AM SO, SO, SO SORRY CONNOR!"

"Evan," Connor said, looking him in the eyes, "It's fine. Really. But, uh, if you don't mind me asking, why do you feel bad about telling me this stuff?"

Evan shrank back in his seat, not really wanting to answer the question, but seeing no way out of it. "W-well, I, um- Rambling is just so annoying, right?”

”No. I mean, you said something about how you’re nervous, or whatever. Why do you feel bad telling me that?” Connor specified before adding, “You don't have to answer."

Evan was uneasy, but he made up his mind. He was going to go for it. Connor had been friendly recently. Evan took a deep breath before answering, "No! It's fine. Really. But, uh... I mean, I guess I feel bad telling you I'm nervous, and stuff. It's just, I'm sure you have problems of your own top deal with, and it's not helping you by giving you my problems to deal with too. Also, it actually is kinda annoying when people start rambling about stuff like that, right? I mean, I don't really mind, but some people probably hate it and I don't want to be hated, especially by you, you're my friend."

"Well..."

"I'm sorry!"

"Evan, really, its fine. Look, you can tell me stuff. I mean, if you have problems that you want to talk about, I want to help you. I want you to be happy, or at least, mostly problem free. But we can only do that if you let me know what's going on, okay?" Evan smiled. His heart warmed hearing Connor say that. "Also, I think the rambling is kinda cute." This last bit was under Connor's breath, but Evan heard nonetheless and felt himself blush.

"T-thanks." Evan wasn't quite sure what else to say, 'thanks' pretty much summed it all up. Even the part that Connor hadn't wanted him to hear. Plus, it wasn't rambling.

"No problem, Ev."

The pair went inside, and Evan decided that as big as the Murphy's house seemed on the outside, it was even bigger on the inside. "Uh, lets go up to my room," Connor said, leading Evan up the stairs. 

Connor's room was a mess. Clothes, papers, paintbrushes, and several other random objects lay scattered across the floor. Connor sat down on his bed while Evan said, "I didn't realize that you liked to paint." A few random sketches and half-finished paintings were spread throughout the room. Evan picked up a small watercolor painting by his foot, immediately recognizing the scene. It was of two small figures laying in the field at the orchard looking at the sky, like he and Connor had done a few times before. "This is... really good."

Connor's face went red. "T-thanks... Sorry. My room's kind of a mess. I usually don't show people my paintings."

"Why not? They're really good!"

"I mean..." Connor began embarrassedly, "I paint for myself. It calms me. Keeps me happy, y'know? But, uh, you really think they're good?"

Evan nodded.

"You can keep it if you want," Connor replied.

"Wha- Are you sure you don't want it?" 

"I don't need it. Besides, if you like it, I want you to have it." Evan felt himself blush lightly.

"Really?"

"Yes. You can keep it, Ev. Really."

"Are you su-"

"KEEP IT, EVAN." Connor raised his voice.

"COOOONNNOOORRRR!!! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY NAIL POLISH?!?! YOU BETTER NOT HAVE TAKEN IT AGAIN! YOU'RE NOT SNEAKY IF YOU DON'T PUT IT BACK!" Zoe hollered, flinging open the door and barging into Connor's room. She marched up to his desk looking for the nail polish, before turning to look on the floor.

"Zoe."

"What? Where did you put it?"

"It's right here," Connor said, holding a bottle of dark, glittery nail polish, which looked sort of like a little galaxy. Evan could see why they both wanted it, he couldn't stop looking at it. Upon closer inspection, he noticed that the same color was painted onto Connor's nails.

"Wait. I thought you were standing over the-" Zoe said in confusion, turning to look at Evan. "Ohhhhh. You brought Evan over early. I see," She turned back to Connor, and Evan swore he saw her wiggle her eyebrows at Connor when she mentioned him. He wasn't quite sure why. She turned back to Evan, sitting next to Connor, who looked annoyed, "Hey Evan. How's it going?"

"Um, it's going well. How about you?"

"I'm fine," she said happily. Connor attempted to shove her off the bed, which almost worked, but not quite. "Slightly less fine now," she said, glaring at Connor. Her eyes lit up as she shoved him back playfully. "So.. have you and Connor been hanging out a lot recently?"

"Uh, kind of. We get ice cream a lot. And see trees," Evan replied awkwardly. He didn't want to tell her all the details, but felt bad saying that they weren't hanging out.

"Wait! Are you guys going to A La Mode? I haven't been there in _forever_. I can't believe you guys went without me!" She cried, punching Connor lightly in the shoulder.

"How did you figure that out from Evan saying 'ice cream' and 'trees'?" Connor asked.

"What else would that mean?" Zoe replied.

"Zoe. Trees are everywhere. Plus, it's not like A La Mode is the only ice cream shop out there."

"Whatever. So, are we just gonna hang out before everyone else gets here?"

Connor glared at his sister, " _We_ are going to hang out, as in Evan and I. As in, not you."

Zoe smirked, "And why's that?"

"Connor, she can stay. It's fine," Evan told him. He wasn't sure why Connor didn't want Zoe to be with them. She wasn't mean or anything, but then again, she and Connor were siblings, which may have changed things.

"Fine. Y'know what? Fine. Stay. Whatever."

"YES!" Zoe cheered. "So... what are we gonna do first?"

"This." Connor said, shoving Zoe off the bed. She shrieked in surprise and hit the ground with a thud. A few seconds later she started laughing. 

"Smooth. Real smooth, Connor," she chuckled. And then Connor started laughing too, a smile spreading across his face. Evan decided that it was kinda cute when he laughed. He just looked so... happy. And free. And then Evan started laughing.

He wasn't quite sure why he was laughing. He wasn't laughing at Zoe. He was laughing with her. And Connor. He couldn't forget Connor. That much he knew.

 

 

 


	13. Evan in the Bathroom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared dreads going over to the Murphys’ house, but finds out that might not be as bad as he thought. And Evan has a sexuality crisis, but Michael tries to help him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it’s been awhile since I updated. Sorry about that! But it’s up now, so yeah. Make sure to let me know what you think! Stay swaggy!

"Remind me why I'm doing this," Jared groaned. He sat in the passenger seat of Alana's car. They were parked in front of the Murphys's house, and were going to sleep over.

"Jared, you're doing this so you can spend time with your friends," Alana replied calmly.

"I mean, there's Evan and you, but I hate Connor! And I barely know Jeremy or Michael, and Zoe..."

"Don't even think about it, Jared." Alana stared him down. Jared decided that she was a very protective girlfriend. He still wasn't over the fact that she and Zoe were dating. He had never seen them even talk to each other before they... Jared just wished people would tell him things. 

He supposed if he were here for any reason it was to get closer to someone. Anyone. He just needed _someone_ to trust him. Evan had been hanging out with Connor, without Jared of course, and it wasn't like Zoe or Alana would ask him to hang out. Plus, he barely knew Jeremy or Michael, but they seemed happy enough on their own. Jared just wished someone would want to spend time with him. 

The pair walked up to the door of the Murphys's house. Alana knocked on the door a few times, before it was flung open by Zoe. "Hey guys!"

"WHO IS IT?" A voice yelled. Connor.

"WHY DON'T YOU COME HERE AND FIND OUT?" Zoe called back.

"FINE!!!!"

A figure poked his head out the door, but it wasn't Connor. "Evan?" Jared asked, "When did you get here?"

"I..."

"SHUT UP KLEINMAN!" Connor yelled, sprinting to the door.

"I didn't even say anything!"

"You were thinking something!"

"Wha- What the hell? It's not like you weren't!"

"You said something to Evan!"

"Am I not allowed to?"

Zoe and Evan shared a concerned glance, before Zoe interjected, "Why don't you guys come inside? You can put your stuff in the basement."

Connor sighed and stepped aside, allowing Jared and Alana to enter, and the five of them wandered down to the basement.

"Well, Jeremy and Michael aren't here yet... but we could do something," Zoe said. "Wait!" She exclaimed. "Everyone, sit in a circle!"

No one was quite sure what was going on, but everyone complied. "Zoe... why are you making us sit in this creepy cult circle?" Connor asked. Jared snickered.

"It's not a cult circle! We're literally just sitting in a circle!"

"Yeah. Like a cult," Jared replied. Connor looked at him, and did he... smile?

"Shut up! It's just so everyone can see everyone else!"

"So... what _are_ we doing?" Alana questioned.

"Well, I hadn't gotten that far yet..."

"Zoe!" Alana groaned.

"Love you!" Zoe chirped sweetly. A knock must've sounded on the door, because Zoe immediately sprang up yelling, "I'LL GET IT!" even though everyone was right there. She grabbed Alana's hand and pulled her girlfriend upstairs with her.

"D-did you guys hear a knock? Or..." Evan asked.

"Glad I'm not the only one," Jared responded. Evan smiled lightly, less concerned that he didn't actually hear anyone knocking. "So, what's up?"

"Um... I-I'm good. Just, y'know, hanging out, I guess." Evan responded quietly.

"Wait. That was a bad question. Um... Uh... I've got nothing. Absolutely nothing. Well, anyone else got something to say?" Jared said.

The other boys were silent for a moment. Connor shook his head. "Well then. How are you Connor?" Jared said, to Connor’s disappointment.

Connor glared at him, obviously not wanting to talk to Jared. "Worse now that you've asked me."

Jared chuckled nervously, "Funny. That's really funny Connor. You are just a... hilarious guy."

"I wasn't kidding." He said, looking Jared in the eye the whole time. Dread pooled in the pit of Jared's stomach. This wasn't going to go well, was it? He must've looked nervous, because Connor burst out laughing. Jared raised an eyebrow and glanced at Evan, who shrugged. "Your face!" Connor laughed. "Sorry. I did mean it at first. Well, I still kinda do, but your face almost changed my mind. Evan was right! I _do_ freak you out!"

Connor and Evan had... talked about him? What else had they said? Evan thought he was freaked out by Connor? He wasn't wrong... but still. Was it that obvious?

Jared felt his face flushing as he turned to Evan, who's face was bright red. "I-I... I didn't mean to..."

Jared sighed. "Look, Evan. I'm just curious... What the hell did you tell him about me?"

"Nothing! Well, n-nothing bad... That was it. I s-swear. J-Jared, you're one of my best f-friends." He was one of Evan's best friends? That was... nice to know. But who else was there? Was it Connor?

"Whatever. I don't really care. It's fine." Jared shrugged it off as Zoe and Alana bounded downstairs, hands full of chip bags, Jeremy and Michael following close behind them.

"So you _are_ here." Connor said.

"What?" Jeremy asked quickly.

"No one heard the knock except for Zoe and Alana, so we thought they made it up," he explained.

"Oh. Okay," Jeremy said, sitting down in the circle. Michael sat next to him, and finally, after setting down all of the food, Zoe and Alana sat down too.

"So, now that we're all here... who wants to play truth or dare?" Zoe asked.

" _That's_ what you were planning?" Alana asked.

"Yep!" Zoe chirped.

"I'm in!" Jeremy said.

"Yeah. This brings back memories," Michael replied, "We used to play truth or dare all the time." His eyes lit up, "I bet I could bring back a few of the really good ones." Jeremy laughed.

"Okay!" Jared answered.

"Are you sure we should-"

"Why don't you want to play, Connor?" Zoe asked. 'Is something- Ohhhhhhhh. I see." She must've realized why Connor didn't want to play. "Well, it's six against one." Was she still going to make him play? Jared smirked.

"I never said I wanted to..." Evan began.

"C'mon! It'll be fun!"

"Alright." Evan agreed easily.

"Okay! Who want's to go first?"

Jared grinned. This was going to be fun. He was still curious why Connor didn't want to play. Oh well. He'd find out. "I'll go first," Jared volunteered. "Zoe, truth or dare?"

"Uh... truth."

This made things easy for Jared. "Why didn't Connor want to play truth or dare?"

Connor went red. "Zoe..."

"Fine. Come on Jared," She stood up, beckoning him to do the same.

"What are you doing?" Connor asked.

"Telling him somewhere more... private."

"Zoe!"

But Zoe and Jared had already ran upstairs.

"Wait. So why does he-"

"Connor has a crush on Evan!" Zoe blurted out.

"Wh-What?" Jared stuttered. It was surprising, but he could kind of see it. 

"You heard me. He has a crush on Evan Hansen."

"Really?"

"This is _truth_ or dare. I'm not lying, Jared. But we _have_ to get them together!"

That actually wasn't a bad idea. If Connor was his boyfriend, then Jared could be Evan's best friend. Plus, he had to admit, they would make a kind of a cute couple. "Okay. Let's do it."

"YES!" Zoe cheered, "You can't let them know though, okay?"

"Okay." Jared grinned. This was going to be... an interesting game, to say the least.

———

Jared and Zoe bounded back down the stairs, both grinning mischeviously. Jared had asked why Connor didn't want to play. Not a bad question, really. Michael wouldn't ask, he barely knew Connor, and he felt bad asking to know some deep dark secret, or whatever, if the guy didn't want him to. But if Jared wanted to know, then good for him. Michael did have to admit he was a little curious though.

"Okay! Who's next?" Zoe asked, sitting back down. Whatever it was, the pair probably dismissed it quickly. What would matter so much that Connor didn't want to play? Michael decided it was probably something unimportant. Like, maybe he just hated dares, or something. "If no one's gonna say anything I'll... pull names from a hat! Or something like that. Does anyone have a pen or paper?" No one answered. Zoe sighed and stood up, walking to the middle of the circle.

"What the hell are you doing now?" Connor asked.

"I'm just gonna close my eyes and spin around and point at someone. Duh. I've done this before, Connor. You know that." Connor rolled his eyes as Zoe made a few quick turns and pointed at Alana.

The other girl sighed. "Alright, let's see... Michael, truth or dare?" 

Michael glanced over at her. "Dare," he answered without hesitation.

"Cool. I dare you to... hmm... you're dating Jeremy, right?" Alana thought aloud. Michael nodded. He wasn't sure where this was going.

Zoe's face lit up. "Ooh! That's a good idea! I know we all probably know, but just in case... lets just all go around and say if we're single and sexualities and stuff. To help with dares." Jared smirked. 

"Are you sure we should do tha-" Connor started to say.

"I'll go first!" Zoe cut him off. "Um, I'm bi. And dating Alana so... You wanna go next?" She asked, glancing over to her girlfriend.

Alana rolled her eyes but followed Zoe's lead nonetheless. "Well, as Zoe said, we're dating, and I'm a lesbian."

Jared's eyes lit up as he grinned wildly. "So! Lucky for you all, I'm single," he wiggled his eyebrows, "Oh. And I'm pan." He added after a reminder from Alana.

"I'm next?" Michael asked. "Uh... I'm dating Jeremy..." He said, glancing at the other boy the entire time. Jeremy blushed lightly, but just enough that he could notice, "And I'm gay... Like, really gay. So, yeah. You're next, Jer."

"I-I'm dating Michael, and I'm bi... so, who's next?"

"How about you, Evan?" Zoe suggested.

"W-well, I'm single. A-and I... um... I-I'm..."

"It's okay, Ev," Connor reassured him.

"Um... I don't really know e-exactly... I-I don't know," Evan stammered. His eyes shifted around, looking at everyone, trying to take in the reaction. "I-I’M SORRY!" He cried suddenly. "You guys had a thing going and I ruined it! I’m so, so, so sorry! I’m sorry! I don’t know!” And then he ran off, rushing up the stairs.

"Great. Just great. Wow, Zoe, what a good idea! Getting Evan Hansen, EVAN HANSEN OF ALL PEOPLE, to cry like that!" Connor snapped.

"I-It's not my fault! I'm sorry, I know it maybe wasn't the best idea, but its not like I knew or wanted that to happen!"

As the two kept bickering, Michael glanced over to Jeremy, who was squeezing his hand. He met the other boy's eyes, which were filled with concern. Michael supposed they were brothers, why _wouldn't_ Jeremy be concerned for him? But Evan had just... ran off like that... Michael knew how hard figuring these things out was firsthand. He just wanted Evan to be okay. And if he could make it easier for him... Well, it would be good knowing he could help.

"Jer... Should we go find him?" Jeremy nodded and sprang to his feet, Michael quickly following.

When they were halfway up the stairs, Michael heard Jared yell, "Where are you two going?"

"We're finding Evan!" Michael shouted back, before rushing up the rest of the stairs.

"So," Jeremy began once they had both reached the top of the stairs, "Do you wanna split up, or should we stick together, or-"

"Maybe we should split up," Michael replied. The house was pretty big and they would find him faster that way. Jeremy nodded, meeting Michael's eyes one more time before he went to search in the other direction. "Wait, Jer!" Michael called quickly. Jeremy spun around. "I'm gonna go look upstairs. Okay?" 

"Yeah, that's cool, Mikey."

"Mikey?"

"Do you have a problem with it?"

"N-no!" Michael stammered, cheeks flushing, "It's just... new. That's all." The last part was muttered under his breath, low enough that his boyfriend wouldn't hear. And then he rushed upstairs to find Evan.

Michael poked his head into room after room, taking more time in what he assumed were Connor and Zoe's rooms, checking to make sure Evan wasn't hiding somewhere. He knew Evan had come over earlier and wanted to make sure that he didn't find some weird hiding spot, or something.

Eventually, Michael reached a closed door. He turned the knob. It was locked. And when he listened he could hear... crying? "Evan?" Michael asked softly. "Can I come in?"

Michael could hear Evan shuffling around behind the door, and a few seconds later, it was opened a crack, the other boy peeking through. Michael slid into the room, closing the door, and Evan slid down the wall, tears falling down his cheeks.

Michael took in the room awkwardly. It was a bathroom. Of course Evan had chosen to cry in the bathroom. Great. It brought back some bad memories to say the least. Michael took a deep breath and sat next to Evan.

"Hey... Uh, you okay?" Evan shook his head. Of course he wasn't! The guy was literally breaking down! That wasn't the best question, but Michael wasn't quite sure how to get into what he wanted to say. "Um, I'm sorry about the-"

"No. I-it's my fault. You guys had a thing going, a-and I ruined it. R-ruined it! I'm sorry. I-its just all of you guys w-were just so... sure of yourselves. A-and I'm not. I-I'm just not."

"Evan, really... It's fine. Honestly, it took me a long time to figure out that I was gay. I mean, a lot of people don't really know exactly how to define themselves. It takes time, y'know? And we should've thought about that before we put you on the spot like that. It's cool that you're not quite sure about your sexuality and stuff yet. You have time to figure it out..."

"I-I know, but... How did you know?"

"Well, uh..." Michael took a deep breath. He hadn't really talked about this to anyone but Christine before. It was kind of weird to be honest. "I had a crush on Jeremy for awhile, I think. I thought I just wanted to be his friend. His best friend! But, uh, I guess the more I thought about it, I realized that what I wanted wasn't exactly platonic. And I was kinda in love with him. But he liked Christine, which was rough. Plus, Jer and the other guys would always talk about girls and how cute they were, but... I didn't really feel anything like that. I mean, they didn't look bad! That's not at all what I'm saying! But I just wasn't attracted to them or anything. And then Christine broke up with Jer, and... Then he was single, and... You pretty much know the rest from there."

"W-what if you like girls, b-but you also like guys?" Evan asked nervously.

"You mean, like, you're bi?"

"Oh! Yeah! Like that! Sorry, I wasn't sure if it had a name... or if that was normal... or..."

"Yeah, it's cool, Evan. I get it. I mean, a lot of my friends are bi, so... You don't have to give it a fancy name or anything though, if you don't want to. But, if you want me to tell you anything else, I can."

"I-I like a name. It makes me feel more c-confident. A-also, I-I think I might be bi.”

"Really?"

Evan nodded.

"Cool! I mean, if it feels right to you, then that's what matters."

Evan wiped his eyes and smiled. "Tha-"

Suddenly the door burst open. "There you are!" Jeremy exclaimed. "Are you okay?" He turned to Evan.

He nodded, standing up. Michael got to his feet and met Jeremy's eyes. The other boy raised an eyebrow. Michael smiled as if to say ‘ _everything is alright_.’  And Jeremy nodded, walking away. Michael turned to follow him and just as he was about to leave the room, Evan called out to him. 

"Michael?" Evan called.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you. For everything." 


	14. The Sleepover™ Part Two: Spin That Bottle!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy gets mega overprotective™ and they play spin the bottle. That’s it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rip in peace. I haven’t posted anything in like a month. Sorry about that, but I posted now, I guess. Also, I’m pretty sure that my notes are like always about the same three things but written with slightly different words. Well :/   
> Enjoy, though! Hope ya like it!

"Um... What was that all about?" Jeremy asked his boyfriend quietly before they went back downstairs. "If you don't mind me asking," he added quickly.

"Evan and I were talking about sexualities and stuff, trying to figure things out. He thinks that he's bi. And... uh, I told him about how I figured out I'm gay. Stuff like that."

"Oh. That's cool,” Jeremy felt himself relax a little bit. It was weird finding Michael and Evan in the bathroom, door closed and everything. Jeremy had to admit, he was a little suspicious at the time. He didn't want to believe anything bad was going on in there, but a small part of him just wondered... If anything, Jeremy was being overprotective of Michael. He just wanted his boyfriend to himself, was that so wrong? Jeremy did decide that he should trust Michael more about these things though. It wasn't like he was going to cheat on Jeremy with Evan or anything. Jeremy wasn't sure why he thought that, but somehow it was the first thing that came into his head, which was... weird.

Jeremy followed Michael downstairs and sat down next to him, leaning into his shoulder. "Okay!" Zoe chirped, "So! Maybe we should do something else... I'm thinking..."

"NO,” Connor said sternly.

"Spin the bottle!" Zoe cried.

"YESSSSSS!" Jared yelled, startling Alana, who punched him playfully in the shoulder. "Let's do it!"

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Connor asked.

"I-I'm fine with it..." Evan replied.

"Are you sure?" Connor said in surprise.

"Y-yeah. I-I am. I think I am."

Connor looked concerned, but if Evan would do it, he would too. "Fine." Connor agreed after a few moments of silence.

"YES!" Zoe and Jared yelled. "Wait. All of you guys wanna play too, right?" Zoe asked quickly.

"Why not?" Michael said with a smile.

"I'll do it," Alana responded coolly.

Jeremy sighed. "Okay." With their old friends, Jeremy and Michael would do things like this all the time. It couldn't be that different... could it? Except Jer barely knew some of these people, and... Whatever. It would be fine. "Let's go."

Zoe ran upstairs, returning with an empty bottle from who-knows-where. "Okay! Who's going first?"

Jared snatched the bottle, grinning widely. He had volunteered himself immediately, not that Jeremy was complaining. _He_ didn't want to go first... but other than that, he was fine.

Jared spun the bottle and everyone watched as it turned a few times before stopping. Stopping on Michael.

Jeremy sighed. This was going to be... awkward. Watching Jared kiss Michael.

"Ah! Michael!" Jared exclaimed. "So... Are you gonna start this, or am I?"

"Jared,” Michael said calmly. Why was he so calm? How was he so calm? Jared sat down in front of Michael and smirked. 

"Alright, pucker up, Michael," Jared said, inching closer to him. 

Michael met Jared's eyes as he leaned in. Jeremy felt himself going red, and he covered his face with his hands, peeking out from between his fingers. Oh god. They were so close now. Jareds's lips were inches from Michael's. Jared leaned in a little closer. They were just about to kiss... 

"No homo," Jared whispered, grinning. 

And then he pressed his lips to Michael's. 

Michael kissed him back lightly for a few moments before they broke apart, and Michael burst out laughing. Jeremy stared at him. "Mikey?" He asked.

Michael was full on cackling by then. "I don't know why I'm laughing so hard! It wasn't that funny! Jer, help!" Michael got out in between laughs. Jeremy laughed a little bit with him, and once they finished, the group prepared to spin the bottle again.

"I guess I'm next," Zoe said, grabbing the bottle. She was next to Jared, so Jeremy figured they were just going around the circle. The bottle slowed to a stop, and Jeremy felt himself blushing. It had landed on him.

"Um... Okay, so how should we-" Jeremy was cut off but Zoe kissing him quickly. He was sure his whole face was red a few seconds later, when she pulled away.

"Alright! Alana, you're next."

Jeremy just sat there, stunned. She just... he didn't see it coming. Jared had taken his time with Michael, but Zoe was very different about it. It did keep the game going quickly though.

"Jer. Jer? You good?" Michael asked, waving his hand in front of Jeremy's face. Crap. He had been staring off into space... towards Zoe. Which must've looked kinda weird. 

"Y-yeah. Sorry," he mumbled.

He looked back towards the game, where the bottle had ended up landing on Connor. Alana looked annoyed. "Well, let's get this over with."

"Agreed," Connor said. He looked kind of tired and bored. Sick of the game at least. Their kiss lasted seemingly no time at all, and then it was Jeremy's turn.

He nervously stuck his hand out, spinning the bottle.

It spun around once.

Twice.

Three times.

And then it stopped.

He looked at who was on the receiving end and let out a breath he didn't know realize he was holding. It had landed on Michael, to Jeremy's relief.

Michael scooted over a little closer to Jeremy. "Well, this one should be easy," Michael said with a smile.

"Huh?" Jeremy met his boyfriend's eyes.

"I mean, I love you... a lot. And I mean, I'll kiss other people if we're doing this, but I still like you the best. It feels kind of... wrong to be kissing someone else, y'know?" Michael explained.

"Yeah. I get that. But, um... I love you, Mikey." And then Michael leaned in and kissed Jeremy. Jeremy melted into the kiss, not wanting it to end. It was gentle and sweet. He attempted to slide his tongue into the kiss. Michael let him. Jeremy grabbed the front of Michael's sweatshirt, leaning into it. He felt Michael running his hands through his hair and Jeremy smiled.

It felt like it had ended as soon as it had began. Michael slowly pulled them apart, and Jeremy let him, as much as it disappointed him. He stared into Michael's beautiful, dark brown eyes, and sighed happily.

"Awwww," he heard Zoe say quietly. That snapped him out of it. He had forgotten for a minute that they were even playing the game... Jeremy felt his face heat up. That meant Michael had to go again next.

"Jer... c'mere." Michael said quietly. Jeremy turned back towards his boyfriend. "Sit with me."

"That was really cute," he heard Zoe comment.

"Agreed," that one was Alana.

"Guys, I think Michael should get to skip his next turn, unless you don't want to! Because that was... adorable. Just, please, take your time," Zoe said. Jeremy felt himself blush. What was that supposed to mean?

"Jer, please. Come here," Michael breathed. Jeremy moved a little closer. "Jeremy. Really..." Jeremy, not quite sure what Michael wanted, moved in front of him, leaning against Michael's chest. He closed his eyes and sighed contentedly as Michael started to play with his hair.

Jeremy decided he could do this forever. Preferably without everyone watching... but still.

The bottle must've been spun again, because where there used to be the chatter of Evan's friends, there was now silence. Jared laughed slightly. Jeremy heard something that sounded like a quiet slap and Jared went quiet. 

He opened his eyes to take in the scene, not sure why they were so quiet. Was he or Michael going to go again? Evan was supposed to go after him, which meant... Did he have to kiss his brother? Oh god. That would be _weird_.

But the bottle wasn't facing him or Michael.

It was facing Connor Murphy.

———

Holy shit.

_Holy shit_.

HOLY SHIT.

Why did he agree to play this stupid game? He knew as soon as Zoe and Jared had come back downstairs exactly what they were up to. They weren't exactly subtle, or anything. Especially Jared. Definitely not Jared.

So why had he agreed? Maybe it was because Evan had. 'What's the worst that could happen?' he had thought. Well, kissing Evan wasn't bad... but it would be if Evan found out about his crush. Evan was straight! He was crushing on adorable, sweet, probably-straight Evan Hansen! Why did he have to do that? Connor loved Evan, but was kind of mad at himself for it. It wasn't like Evan would ever return his feelings.

Connor felt his face going red, and he realized that he was staring right at Evan. Crap. That didn't help make it look any less crush-like. As he looked at the other boy, he realized that Evan was blushing too. And was Evan... shaking a little bit? Oh god. This was awful. Evan fricking Hansen, his best and only real friend, was afraid to kiss him. What else could that _possibly_ mean?

"Evan... I, uh..."

"Kiss already!" Jared yelled. 

"Shut up, Kleinman!" Connor snapped.

Evan nodded, still staring at Connor.

"Um, how should we-" Connor began.

"Could we go somewhere more... private?" Evan asked quietly. Connor agreed, there was a lot more pressure with everyone watching.

"Kinky," Jared muttered under his breath, just loud enough that Connor could hear. His face went even redder.

"Uh, what do you guys think? Can they go somewhere else?" Zoe asked.

"Just kiss!" Jared yelled again.

"Yeah. I mean, I know I asked the question, but it's kinda against the point if you guys go..."

"Fine!" Connor hissed.

"Um, Connor?" Evan asked quietly.

"Wha?" Connor asked, turning his attention back towards his crush.

"W-we can just k-kiss here. I guess... I mean, everyone else d-did it, so... I... sh-shouldn't we do it t-too?" Evan said quietly, gazing up at Connor. 

"Um... I... If you really want to." Connor glared at Zoe and Jared to say, _you asked for it_ , before he grabbed the collar of Evan's shirt, pulling the boy towards him. Evan's breathing caught. Was that normal? Their lips were nearly touching, if either one of them moved a little bit... Connor looked Evan in the eyes. The other boy's blue eyes were nervous, but they didn't break eye contact. And then Connor pulled Evan's lips to his, enveloping the boy in a kiss.

———

Evan's eyes went wide as Connor Murphy kissed him. He went tense for a split second, still shocked it was happening, before relaxing into the kiss. 

Evan still hadn't processed exactly what was happening, but he closed his eyes, thinking, mid-kiss. The first thing that occurred to Evan, was that he could be messing this up. This was his first kiss, so he had no idea what he was supposed to be doing. Was there a right way to do it? He really hoped he wasn't messing this up. Especially for Connor. He wanted this kiss to be the best for Connor. He hoped Connor liked it.

Connor. Evan was kissing Connor. 

That was the second thing he thought. If he was being totally honest, Evan thought his first kiss would be with a girl... Zoe Murphy to be exact. And... it was with a Murphy, just not who he expected. He didn't mind. Evan decided he liked this better. If this was what kissing was supposed to be like, then he liked it. Connor was a good kisser. 

Connor was rough, but somehow gentle at the same time. Evan liked it. Connor slid his tongue into Evan's mouth. Evan was startled, and again, unsure what to do, but he let Connor do it nonetheless. Before Evan realized what he was doing, he started playing with Connor's hair. He twirled it between his fingers gently, separating the soft strands carefully. Evan decided that Connor's hair would be nice for braiding, or something. Connor would look good like that. Not that he didn't look good already, but he would look even cuter like that.

Evan remembered a few seconds later that everyone was watching. Panicked, his eyes flew open, and he tore himself away from Connor. His face went red, and he started stuttering, "I-I'M S-SORRY! I-I JUST... I-I... UM... WHY IS IT SO HARD TO TALK TO YOU?" Evan buried his face in his hands, hugging his knees to his chest. Tears sprang to his eyes. Why did he have to ruin it? Why did he have to ruin everything?

"Evan," Connor began.

"I-I'm sorry!"

Connor glared at the others, who quickly retreated upstairs, before sitting next to Evan, placing a hand on his shoulders. "Are you okay?"

"No! I just... I... I ruined it! It was going so well and I had to ruin it! Just like everything else!"

"Evan you don't ruin everything."

"Give me one example."

"That. If anything, you fixed it. They all went away, just like you wanted... and," Connor's voice cracked, "we don't have to do this anymore."

"Huh?"

"I said... Wait. Earlier did you say the kiss was... going well?"

Evan felt his face go red. "I-I... um... maybe?"

"You thought so?" Connor asked, relaxing a little.

"I-it was my first kiss..."

"Really? Did I make it worthwhile?" Connor smirked.

Evan blushed even more, "Y-yes," he breathed in a small voice.

Connor's face went red. "Wh-what?" As much as he wanted the answer to be yes, Connor didn’t exactly expect it.

"I-I, um... It wasn't b-bad," Evan stammered.

"Uh... well... I... really?"

Evan nodded. He had so much to say, but wasn't sure how to say it. Like how it felt when Connor Murphy was kissing him. And how he felt around him. And how maybe he had a little crush on him. "I... uh, IMEANITWASAMAZINGANDILOVEDITANDILOVEDTHATITWASWITHYOU!IMEANITWASUNEXPECTEDBUTISTILLLOVEDIT,IMEANYOU'REAMAZINGANDIKINDALOVEYOUMAYBEALITTLEBUTIDON'TKNOWBECAUSEITHINKIMBIBUTIMNOTREALLYSUREBUTTHATSEEMSPRETTYBISOITHINKIPROBABLYLIKEGUYSTOO... especially you."

"Um... Can you say that whole thing again, but slower? I got none of that."

Evan took a shaky breath, "I think I love you, Connor! That's what I said! I kinda love you a little bit!" Evan shouted before he realized what he was doing. "IM SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO-"

Evan was cut off by Connor kissing him again. It was quick though, Connor suddenly pulled them apart. "You have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to say that. I love you so much, you don't even know. I've been crushing on you for weeks! Oh god. That sounds kinda creepy, but I swear it's not. You're just so fricking cute and..."  Connor sighed happily, "I love you, Ev. I really do."

Evan smiled widely, happy tears springing to his eyes. He wrapped Connor in a tight hug, which startled him, but eventually Connor hugged him back, awkwardly accepting Evan's embrace. They stayed like that for who knows how long, not wanting the moment to end.

"Yessssssss," Evan heard Jared say, attempting to be quiet. Jared was never quiet though, so... Evan looked up at the boy, who was standing on the stairs watching them, with everyone else. Evan blushed. "About time!" Zoe slapped him on the shoulder and Evan felt himself laugh.

Some things would never change.


	15. Don’t Cry Over Spilled Orange Juice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After giving Jared a really awful dare during truth or dare, everyone decides to give Jeremy a bunch of truths and dares all in a row. And things go downhill from there... Also, Christine calls, so...

"Yesssssss," Jared said,  a huge grin spreading across his face. Evan glanced up at them and Zoe blushed. She decided that she shouldn't have watched, but Jared had done it and she had followed and then... "About time!" Jared called down. 

Zoe slapped him on the shoulder before hissing, "Shut up and let it happen, Jared!" But Jared had already made his way down the stairs, leaving Zoe no choice but to chase after him. She had read enough love stories to know that love could take time... and Jared interrupting wouldn't help any bonding moments. Evan laughed as he watched Zoe attempt to catch Jared, before she sighed and flopped down on the couch. The rest of the group quickly joined them downstairs. "So... how was it?" Zoe asked, knowing very well how it went.

Connor went red, and it was actually Evan who spoke next. "Connor is... I think I'm kinda bi, and I think I kinda like Connor..." he said quietly.

"So are you two... together? Or..." Alana asked casually.

Connor froze. "W-we didn't... we j-just... Do you want to be?" He looked down at Evan, who nodded slowly.

"Cool," she smiled, sitting next to Zoe, who was laying upside down on the couch, head hanging over the edge. "So, what should we do now?" she asked, getting directly to the point.

"Uh, I don't know..." Michael said.

"Truth or dare?" Zoe asked, "Now that Connor isn't paranoid about revealing his crush, it might be good."

Everyone agreed, and soon enough, they were all sitting back in the circle, prepared to play truth or dare.

Jeremy began, "Jared, truth or dare?" 

"Dare! Duh."

Jeremy smirked mischeviously, glancing to Michael, who burst out laughing. "Do you guys have any toothpaste?"

Connor nodded and Jared raised an eyebrow, "You want me to brush my teeth? You could have just said I have bad breath."

Jeremy's smile grew. "What about orange juice?"

Jared went pale. "NOOOOOO! THATS ACTUALLY THE WORST! HOW COULD YOU? THATS DISGUSTING!"

Soon enough, they were crowded around Jared, who was chugging a glass of gross, minty orange juice. He winced as he finished, slamming the glass down. "I think I'm gonna throw up." 

"Well, don't do it on me!" Alana exclaimed.

"If I'm throwing up on anyone, its gonna be Jeremy. Sorry, but you asked for it when you made me do this."

Jeremy just laughed. "My friend Rich gave me that dare once. It sucked at the time, but looking back on it, it was pretty funny."

"Zoe, truth or dare?" Connor asked.

"Uh... truth," Zoe decided. 

"What's your darkest secret?"

Zoe thought for a minute. "Well, I'm kinda an open book, so..."

"Say something! Anything!" Connor snapped.

"Fine. Uh, I... I guess I set this thing up to get you and Evan together." Zoe says.

Connor's face went red. "ZOE!"

"What? Oh! Crap. Maybe that one wasn't very good..."

Evan looked nervous. "I-I... Connor?"

"Ev, I love you! A lot! I just didn't want to tell you I liked you and I swear I like you and it's not at all Zoe! I love you so much Ev-"

Connor was cut off by Evan kissing him quickly. "I-I'm sorry. It's just... I don't want you to h-hate me, and... I'm s-sorry, C-Connor."

Zoe felt dread pooling in her stomach. She just didn't want to ruin Connor and Evan's relationship as soon as it had begun. "Evan," She began, "I'm sorry I brought it up, but I swear, Connor liked you from the moment he saw you."

"Zoe," Connor said warningly.

"He came home and couldn't stop talking about you!"

"Zoe!"

"He was all, 'Evan Hansen this!' and, 'Evan Hansen that!' and, 'I love Evan Hansen!' and, 'I wish Evan Hansen would f-"

"ZOE!" Connor screeched, going red. 

"Okay, okay. But you get the point."

Evan looked uneasy, but Zoe must've done something right because he smiled slightly and replied, "T-thanks, Zoe."

"Michael, truth or dare?" Jared asked, getting back to the game.

"Dare!" He replied without a second thought.

"Okay... I dare you to... Switch glasses with Alana! For maybe, like, 10 minutes, but still..."

Michael sighed, handing Alana his glasses. "I can't believe I'm doing this," Alana groaned as she handed hers to Michael. "How can you see in these?" she asked, "They're so dirty! There's like five fingerprints, and those are only the clearest ones."

Jeremy laughed. "What's so funny?" Michael asked his boyfriend.

"That sounds exactly like your glasses."

"Shut up!"

"Well, that, and I'm remembering the time you tried to wear contacts and then poked your eye and cried so hard that they came out," Jeremy admitted. Jared snickered.

Michael went red. "Jer! You promised never to speak of that moment to anyone! Ever!"

"Actually, I promised not to tell our old friends..." 

"Can we punish him?" Michael asked, "For admitting my deepest, darkest secret?"

Jared smirked, "And for the orange juice thing?"

"We should all make him do either a ton of truths, or a ton of dares, all in a row!" Zoe cried.

"Yeah!" Jared copied.

Jeremy went pale, "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Yes!" Jared exclaimed matter-of-factly.

"Aww yeah!" Zoe cheered.

"Yep! Sorry, babe. Love you!" Michael chimed in, grinning.

Jeremy sighed. "Fine. Let's get this over with."

"Okay. Jer, truth or dare?" Zoe asked. 

"...Truth..."

"Okay! What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened since you moved here?"

Jeremy went red. "I... uh..." his voice went quiet, "Once, Evan walked in on me w-watching p-porn, and I... uh..."

"SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE HANSENS IN THE BACK!" Zoe yelled, wanting to make sure everyone heard, specifically Connor and Evan, who were a little farther away.

"EVAN ALMOST SAW ME WATCHING PORN! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?"

"Yes! Thank youuu!"

Evan was blushing along with Jermey now. It was Alana's turn now. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to, hmmm... I know the rest of them are gonna go hard on you, so why don't you... just wear Michael's hoodie the rest of the night. If that's cool with you, Michael."

"Sure, but take it off if you have to do something gross," Michael said, sliding the hoodie over his head and handing it to Jeremy, who quickly put it on, settling into it's warmth.

Jared was next. "Dare or dare?"

"Truth. Wait a minute..."

"That wasn't an option. Dare it is!"

"Jared..." Alana said.

"C'mon! You know he's just gonna do truth because he doesn't want me to get revenge!" Jared whined.

"How about this, since there's six of us, you have to do three truths and three dares?" Zoe suggested.

"Fine!" Jared sighed, "I truth you to-"

"Jared. That's improper grammar,” Alana stated.

"Wow. So now you're the grammar police? So, as I was saying, I truth you to... What do you regret the most?"

"That was deeper than I expected," Alana replied.

"What? So now I'm not allowed to ask good questions?"

"I just didn't expect it."

Jeremy took a deep breath, his eyes watered. "So, last year... I got a squip. It's this little pill that you take, and it goes into your brain and teaches you how to be cool. But, um, I took it. And we got it off, thank god, but, not before I hurt a lot of people. And I hurt Michael. I abandoned him at a party, and the squip was off then too! That was all me! I don't know what happened but I did so many stupid things and I just... I thought I was doing the right thing, but I just ruined everything..."

"Jeremy, I'm so sorry," Jared said gently.

Jeremy was crying by then and Michael walked over to him, wrapping Jeremy into a hug and stroking his hair as Jeremy cried into his shoulder. "Shhh... Shhh... It's okay... It's all over now... You're safe now..."

"Maybe we should watch a movie or something..." Evan suggested quietly. Connor nodded in agreement.

"Good idea," Zoe said, signaling to Michael who nodded while still talking to Jeremy. "What should we watch?"

"Have you seen Newsies?" Evan asked.

"I LOVE NEWSIES!" Zoe exclaimed. "WE HAVE TO WATCH IT I CANT BELIEVE YOU LIKE IT TOO THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY!"

Jeremy glanced over, wiping his eyes. "N-Newsies?" he stuttered.

"It's a musical," Michael explained, "About these newsboys who have a strike... or something like that. You'd like it."

"YOu liKE NEwSIES TOO?" Zoe cried excitedly. 

Michael nodded.

"I can't believe it! Guys, I'm so excited," Zoe cheered, thrilled about getting to watch the movie.

"She'd like C-Christine," Jeremy sniffled.

"Yep," Michael agreed, rubbing Jeremy's back gently. "Yes she would."

———

Connor's eyes fluttered open to a dark room. Where the hell was he? Connor shut his eyes, deciding he was too tired to figure these things out before realizing something. He wasn't in his room. And if he wasn't in his room, then...

Connor's eyes shot open and he took in the room. No lights were on, unless you counted the TV, which lit up some of the room. That was when Connor realized he was in the basement still. He was lying on the couch, and as he looked around, he noticed that everyone else was laying around the room too. That's when all the events of the previous night came back to him.

When Evan came over, worrying about his crush, when Evan freaked out, and the kiss... How could he forget the kiss? 

Connor looked down to see Evan laying next to him, arms wrapped around Connor. Connor felt himself smile and blush a little bit. He moved one of his hands to ruffle Evan's hair, being careful not to wake him up. 

Evan was cute when he was sleeping. He looked so... peaceful. Connor realized that this sounded kind of creepy... He was literally watching Evan sleep! But he didn't care. He was tired anyways...

Suddenly, a flash went off in another corner of the room. Connor's head snapped toward it, looking for the source of the light. "Shit," Jared breathed. 

Jared was... taking pictures of them sleeping? That was weird. Connor wasn't sure how much he liked the idea of Jared doing that. "Kleinman," Connor hissed, hopefully quiet enough not to wake Evan up, "I swear to god, if you don't delete that right now..."

"Sorry! I didn't realize my flash was on. Pathetic mistake, really-"

"Jared! Delete it!"

"No no no. It's really fine, Connor!"

"DELETE IT!"

"What's going on?" Evan asked sleepily, opening his eyes and looking up at Connor.

"Shit," Connor whispered.

"Huh?" Evan replied.

"I MEAN CRAP! NOTHING IS WRONG, EVAN! SEE! EVERYTHINGS FINE!" Connor laughed nervously, not wanting to worry Evan, but vowing revenge on Jared.

"Okay... Where's Zoe?" Evan asked, not noticing Jared was even awake.

Connor looked around frantically. Where was Zoe? 

Suddenly, Zoe bounded down the stairs, Michael following her. She flipped on the lights, grinning widely. "Good morning!" She cried in a sing song voice.

"Ughhh," Jared groaned, rolling over, acting like he was waking up. "It's morning already? Isn't life crazy? One second, we're watching Newsies, and the next, I'm taking pictures of Co-"

"YEAH! LIFE SURE IS WEIRD LIKE THAT, JARED," Connor cut in. Jared's sentence dissolved into laughter.

"Guess what?" Zoe asked, beaming.

"What?" Connor asked monotonously.

"We! Made! FOOD!" Zoe exclaimed happily.

"What did you make?" Evan asked quietly.

"Come look!" Zoe cried, waving Evan over to follow her back upstairs.

"Uh, I hate to break it to you, Zoe, but Jer and Alana are still sleeping," Michael cut in.

"Ughhhh sleep is for the weak!" Zoe groaned.

"I heard that, Zoe!" Alana frowned, sitting up.

"Oh! Heh... Love you, babe!"

"Zoe, you could stay awake for like a day and a half, with a single cup of coffee."

"Alana! Wait... Were you just pretending to be asleep?" Zoe asked.

"What were you saying about food?" Alana replied, conveniently changing the subject.

Zoe sighed. "I'll bring them up. Michael, do you wanna wake Jeremy up?"

"Yeah, I can do that," Michael smiled.

"C'mon!" Zoe grinned, starting up the stairs, "We made pancakes!"

"Pancakes? I'm in!" Jared said before following her, Evan and Connor not far behind.

Zoe pulled out a few plates, saying, "Help yourselves!" before gesturing to a plate full of pancakes.

"Sweet!" Jared grinned, "Wait... Are these chocolate chip pancakes?"

"Huh?" Zoe asked, spinning around. "Oh. Yeah. Not all of them are, but-"

"I LOVE CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES! HELL YEAH!" Jared yelled.

"OH MY GOD! I DO TOO! THEY'RE MY FAVORITE!" Zoe shrieked.

While Zoe and Jared were freaking out over chocolate chip pancakes, Connor helped himself to a sizable stack of pancakes, before drenching them with syrup. Evan grabbed himself a couple pancakes too, before walking over to sit with Connor. 

"Hey, Ev," Connor smiled, taking a bit of his food.

"Hello!"

"Uh... About last night..."

"Huh?"

"Are you sure that you want to... date me?"

Evan looked up at Connor, face filled with worry. "Do I seem like I don't? I'm sORRY CONNOR I DONT MEAN TO I SWEAR! ITS JUST WE ONLY JUST-"

"No no no! I get it... But I just... It seems too good to be true."

Evan blushed a little bit. "I-I... I love you. And I wo-worry about the same th-things. And I get it if you wa-want someone better than me, so-"

"EVAN!" Evan went silent as Connor pulled him into a gentle kiss. "I swear," Connor said, "I love you. A lot. And even if we fight and stuff, I still do. It's just... I'm nervous that you're just saying that to mock me... or something..."

"No... I would never do that..."

"I know... I lo-"

"HEY GUYS! WHATCHA TALKIN ABOUT OVER HERE?" Jared boomed, sitting right between Evan and Connor.

"NOTHING!" Evan screeched, "...important. Nothing important! Heh. Yeah. That's what I said. Nothing important."

"Okaaaaaaay..." Jared trailed off before digging into his pancakes. "These are delicious, Zoe!" He got out in between bites. 

"Tell Michael! It was his idea anyways," Zoe chirped, walking over to the table with Alana.

"What about me?" Michael asked, walking up the stairs with a tired Jeremy following him.

"We were talking about the pancakes!" Zoe explained.

"Pancakes?" Jeremy asked, immediately perking up.

"I told you about them earlier..." Michael trailed off.

Eventually, once everyone got their food and had sat down, Jeremy's phone rang. 

Jeremy frowned. "Who is it?" Michael questioned.

"It's Christine," he answered. "She usually doesn't call so early."

"Who's Christine?" Evan asked.

"She's an old friend of ours," Michael explained. "She's pretty great. And she's super into theatre."

"Oh."

"I'm gonna answer it. Something's probably wrong," Jeremy thought aloud. "Hey, Chri-"

"JErEMIaH HEERe!" Christine shrieked from the other end of the phone. She was loud enough that the whole room could hear her.

"Jesus!" Jeremy jumped out of his chair a little bit. "Chrissy, I'm with people, so-" he paused for a minute before saying, "Okay. Okay," and hanging up. "She wants me to FaceTime her," he explained as the phone rang again.

"HEY, JER! WHo else is with you, by the way?" Christine yelled happily.

Jeremy turned the phone and Michael waved, "Hey, Christine."

"Oh. That's Evan," Jeremy explained, pointing to his brother, "And that's Jared. Over there is Connor, and those two are Alana and Zoe."

"Hi!" Zoe smiled.

"Hello!" Christine chirped. "Jer, we're all here too!" She turned the phone to reveal Rich, Jake, Chloe, Brooke, and Jenna all crammed into a car.

"Where are ya going?" Jeremy asked.

"Can I tell him?" Christine whispered loudly. Connor smirked. He wasn't sure about Christine yet, but she certainly had a lot of character... "Okay." She took a deep breath. "WE'RE COMING TO SEE YOU GUYS!"

"Oh my god," Evan whispered. Christine was super loud, even over the phone.

Jeremy broke out in a grin, "You guys _have_ to meet them!"

"Are you sure we shoul-" Connor began.

"Connor!" Evan hissed, "Please, just do this. For me."

"Fine."

"Yeah!" Zoe grinned.

"Okay, where should we meet up? Do you wanna go anywhere, or something? Maybe we could stop somewhere and then drive the rest of the way back to your place!" Christine suggested.

"Alright," Jeremy turned to the rest of the group, "Any ideas?"

Evan got this look on his face, and Connor didn't like it. Evan glanced toward him questioningly. As if he were asking if they could go somewhere. And the place they hung out the most was...

"Evan," Connor said warningly.

"We should go to A La Mode!" Evan said, looking Connor dead in the eye.

"YES!" Zoe cried, a smile spreading across her face.

"What's A La Mode?" Michael asked.

"Ice cream!" Zoe answered cheerfully. "It's really good ice cream!"

"I'm in!" Michael grinned.

"Same!" Jared smirked.

"Jared, you just ate, like, five pancakes..." Alana said quietly.

"And now I want ice cream!" Jared replied.

"Whatever," Alana frowned.

"Awesome! Let's do it!" Christine replied. 

"When will you guys be there?" Jeremy asked.

Christine typed it into her phone before saying, "One hour."

"Okay. See you then!" Jeremy said, before exchanging goodbyes and hanging up.

"Well, at least we know what we're doing the rest of the day," Jared said.

Connor wasn't sure how he felt about this yet. He didn't know these people and had to hang out with them all day! He just hoped that they weren't insane or anything. He could deal with Jared and Zoe in the same room, so maybe he could deal with these people too.

This was going to be an... interesting day, to say the least.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP in peace. I haven’t updated in forever. But here it is! Sorry for the hiatus, but I’m back! There’s only a couple chapters left, so... Oh! Also let me know what you think. Stay Swaggy!


	16. The Most Amazing Trees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evan’s friends and the Squip Squad meet up for the first time. That’s pretty much it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY! There’s only one chapter left after this! Wowee! As always, let me know if you like it and stay swaggy!

"MIcHAEL!” Christine screeched sprinting towards the boy at top speed. 

"Hey, Chrissy!" Michael grinned, hugging the shorter girl.

"Christine! You made it!" Jeremy said as Christine walked over to pull him into a hug too. "Uh, this is Evan, my stepbrother, and this is his boyfriend Connor. That's Connor's sister, Zoe, and her girlfriend, Alana. Oh, and that's Jared."

"The one and only!" Jared cut in. Christine giggled.

"Nice to meet you! The others are gonna be so happy to see you guys!" Christine said, bursting with excitement.

"Yeah... Where is everyone else?" Jeremy asked.

"I made them wait in the car. I told them that they have to act somewhat civilized in order to come in... I also said that I'd go get them when you guys got here, so I should probably go get them. They're just pulling their stuff together. Last I checked, Rich was screaming into a pillow someone brought with us, Brooke was asking if a Pinkberry is nearby, Jake was trying to get Rich to watch vines with him, and Chloe was on her phone doing something... Probably trying to find the closest Pinkberry."

"What about Jenna?" Michael questioned.

"Oh! She's trying to tune them all out by blaring musicals."

"Nice!" Zoe grinned.

"Last I checked, she was listening to Falsettos, but..."

"Wait... Falsettos?" Zoe replied quietly.

"Yeah. It's about this family in the late 70s, early 80s and-"

"I ABSOLUTELY LOVE FALSETTOS!"

"YOU DO?" Christine asked in disbelief. Zoe nodded intensely. "Oh my god! Most people don't really know Falsettos!"

"I know!" Zoe smiled, "I love it though!"

"I do too! Listen, we can talk about Falsettos in a minute, but I'm gonna go get everyone else first." Christine replied, walking out to the car.

"Connor!" Zoe exclaimed, "She knows Falsettos!"

Connor smirked, "Yep. Well, its about time you found someone else to listen to it with you."

"If you think for a second that I won't keep making you listen to it, you're wrong. Besides, I know you love it."

Connor didn't deny it. 

Soon enough, Christine returned with the others, and everyone ordered their ice cream before cramming into a booth.

"So, who exactly are you guys?" Jared asked, taking a bite of his cookie dough ice cream.

"Jared!" Evan hissed under his breath. 

"It's fine," Michael reassured Evan, "Right guys?" He stared the others down, making sure they didn't worry Evan any more.

"Yeah..." Jake trailed off.

"It's cool, man. I'm Rich, by the way," he smiled, grabbing Jake's hand.

"More like bi the way," Jake muttered under his breath. It took everything Michael had not to burst out laughing. It was good to have everyone back.

"Anyways, I don't know about you guys, but I was supposed to have a history test tomorrow, which I'm happy to be skipping," Rich began, "Wait, Chloe, aren't you in my history class?"

"How could I ever forget?" Chloe deadpanned.

"Guys! How about we do some icebreakers or something to get to know each other?" Christine suggested.

"NO!" Connor immediately interjected.

"Why not? Everyone loves ice-"

"Ma-maybe we could... n-not do that..." Evan said quietly.

"That's fine..." Christine said sadly, disappointed not to be doing icebreakers. Michael felt himself smiling. It was just like how things were...

"Wait, how long are you guys staying?" Jeremy asked suddenly.

"We were thinking we would stay for a couple days, right?" Brooke replied, turning to the rest of the group, who nodded.

"And you guys are ditching school to see us?" Michael questioned. 

"Pretty much," Jake answered.

"Huh. I'll ask my moms if I can hang out with you guys," Michael said. He knew they would say yes... probably. His moms usually would let him do things like this if it was really important to him. And if one said no, he would just ask the other, who would hopefully say yes. He just hoped he didn't get into an infinite loop of them telling him "go ask your mother". That was a problem sometimes...

"Sweet!" Jake grinned.

"What's your new school like?" Jenna asked.

"It's good," Jer replied, "I mean, I have Michael with me. And Evan and his friends too. They're all nice, so... yeah."

"Has anything interesting happened for you guys?" Michael asked.

"Not really. Unless you count the time Rich and Jake got caught making out in a closet," Chloe responded calmly. Rich and Jake both blushed intensely.

"Why am I not surprised?" Jeremy laughed.

"Is there a Pinkberry nearby?" Brooke said.

"Brookie!" Chloe exclaimed.

"What?"

"You're eating ice cream right now!"

"And? Froyo is better!"

"Whatever you say..." Jared muttered, perfectly content with his ice cream.

"Christine..." Jenna trailed off.

"Yes?" Christine asked sweetly.

"Did you seriously get sprinkles? Those things are literally pure sugar! You were already on an insane sugar high last night!" Jenna cried.

"I needed to feel awake for the drive!" Christine argued.

"Plus they're gross. Sprinkles are weird as hell," Jenna responded.

Christine gasped dramatically. "How _dare_ you insult sprinkles! They're _so_ good!"

"Sorry, Jenna, but I'm gonna have to agree with Christine on this one," Brooke said.

"Why do you guys love sprinkles so much?" Connor asked. "They taste like satan's asshole."

Michael burst out laughing and Rich snickered. "How do you know what that tastes like?" Jared asked quietly, causing Michael to start laughing harder.

"Dude? Why are you laughing so hard?" Jeremy asked, on the verge of laughter himself.

"S-satan's ass-asshole," Michael got out in between laughs.

"But really, sprinkles are gross," Connor finished.

"When you guys are done, do you wanna go hang out somewhere?" Evan asked.

"Did you have somewhere in mind?" Alana replied.

"Maybe..." he said, looking up at Connor.

"Fine," Connor sighed, "We can go to the orchard."

"An orchard?" Rich asked.

"YES! I haven't been there in forever!" Zoe cheered.

Michael had to admit, he was curious about the orchard. He wasn't sure about it though, because Connor always acted like he didn't want anyone to know about it. He didn't want to go there if it made Connor uncomfortable. Connor seemed nice enough. Honestly, Michael didn't know him that well.

There was that one time when they saw each other at Seven Eleven, though. Michael was buying a slushie when Connor had come in and noticed him. The taller boy had walked over to Michael, and tapped him on the shoulder. Michael had shrieked and whirled around, thinking a stranger had just tapped him, but immediately calmed down once he realized it was Connor. After that, he realized that he'd spilled his slushee while he was freaking out, and Connor had offered to buy him another one. Of course, he had also bought one for himself, and the two had sat outside  Seven Eleven for a bit, just talking. Mostly about and Evan and Jer. Mostly.

"I mean, if you guys want to, I'll go," Michael felt himself saying, looking straight at Connor.

Everyone looked at Connor for a moment before he snapped, "Alright! Fine! We can go! I don't really care!"

And then Zoe started cheering. 

As everyone finished up their ice cream, Michael had one thing on his mind, he was just waiting for the right time to say it.

Once everyone was done, Zoe and Christine ushered everyone to the cars. Michael stuck towards the back of the group, towards Connor.

"Hey," he said, turning towards the taller boy.

"What?" Connor snapped.

"Are you sure you wanna do this? I mean, I can try to convince them not to go if you don't want them to. I know the orchard is kind of... private, but-"

"No!" Connor yelled, "I mean, no." He lowered his voice so just Michael would hear. "Look, I know I made a big deal about it, and it is special, but if Evan wants people to see it, then I do to. I just want him to be happy, y'know? I don't really care anyways. I shouldn't be the only one who gets to see it. It used to be open to everyone, and I think it still should be. I mean, it's closed now, but you get the point. I just want Ev to be happy."

"Okay. Whatever you say," Michael said, voice filled with uncertainty, and he climbed into the car, looking back at Connor one more time.

———

Jeremy stepped out of the car and gasped. The orchard was beautiful, almost otherworldly. The way the once neat rows of trees were disrupted by saplings, the crisp, red apples among the green leaves, how the light filtered through the leaves... it was spectacular. 

"Huh..." Rich breathed, stepping up beside Jeremy. "Trees."

"So this is where you and Evan sneak off to when you wanna make out?" Jared asked, turning to Connor. Jeremy had to admit, he kinda felt bad for Connor. Jared was nice, but he could be sort of... intrusive sometimes. 

"Shut up, Kleinman!" Connor hissed. 

"Wow," Chloe began, "It's so..."

"Empty?" Brooke suggested. "Tree-ish? Nature-y?" 

"I was gonna say boring, but yeah," Chloe responded with a frown.

"Well, Chloe's right," Zoe decided after looking around for a good long while.

"Right about what?" Jeremy felt himself asking, knowing exactly what Zoe meant.

"It's kinda run down and maybe we shouldn't be here. It sounded like a good idea earlier, but I don't really think anything good will be here." Jeremy gaped at her. Nothing good? Here? The place was fricking beautiful! He decided that he could sit at the orchard for hours, doing nothing but just sitting and watching the scenery. Did they seriously not notice that? How could they not care?

"Jer?" Michael asked, noticing his expression, "You good?"

Jeremy smiled awkwardly, "Uh, yeah. I'm fine... We can g-go... if you want!"

"Yeah... We've been in the car for hours! I just want to do something fun now, y'know?" Jake said.

Jeremy laughed nervously. "Yes. I know exactly what you mean," he said quietly and not meaning it at all.

"What? Being in the car with us for several hours wasn't fun?" Jenna asked sarcastically.

"It actually wasn't. Thanks for asking, but I didn't think it was that hard to understand," Jake replied, Jenna's sarcasm completely going over his head.

"Jakey?" Rich said, grabbing his hand. The taller boy looked down at him and raised an eyebrow. "That was sarcasm."

"Shit," Jake breathed, "Not again."

Jeremy laughed. Jake seemed like he was pretty cool, he always acted like it. He was super tall, great at pretty much everything, and a nice guy. It was no wonder that people liked him so much. And it wasn't that Jake wasn't cool, it was just that he was just as much of a dork as the rest of them. 

It was important to remeber that sometimes.

"Okayyyyy," Christine trailed off, "Can we go now?"

"YES." Connor cried, eager to leave for whatever reason.

"Are you okay with that, Evan?" Zoe asked softly.

Evan sighed in disappointment but nodded as he walked back towards the car.

"Wait!" Jer yelled, causing everyone to stare at him.

Shit.

He didn't mean to do that! He just didn't want to leave, and...

"What?" Michael asked, furrowing his brow.

"I, uh... It's nice here... Sorry. That was stupid. We ca-can go," Jeremy breathed, looking back at the orchard one last time.

"Okay!" Jared grinned, running to the car and flinging open the door. 

Jeremy stared off into the distance, lost in thought. 

How could they not care? The orchard was amazing! And so peaceful too! Jeremy felt like he could stay there forever. And they just wanted to leave? How the hell... Why? Just why? It made no sense! He could understand why Evan loved it so much and always wanted to come to the orchard. Jeremy had a feeling that he would want to come there a lot too. But he couldn't. Because he didn't know how to drive, which meant he depended on Michael, and he felt bad dragging Michael out to the orchard against his will. Or anyone else for that matter. Not that anyone else would drive him...

"Jer?"

"Huh?" He asked snapping out of his thoughts.

Christine looked up at him, "Where are we going now?"

"We can, uh, go to my house," he suggested.

Christine's face lit up and a warm smile spread across her face. "Okay! See you there!" And then she skipped off to the car.

Jeremy slowly walked to the car and slumped down in his seat.

Michael sat down next to him and squeezed his hand. "Hey, you good?"

"Wha? Oh. Yeah. I'm... fine."

Michael frowned slightly, "Okay... But dude, if you need to talk, you know you can, right?"

Jeremy smiled slightly. "Yep. I got it. Thanks Michael."

That seemed to satisfy Michael, because he turned to Jared and began a conversation about the shaving cream prank that they had pulled on Rich and Jake, and how they had caught it on video. But Jeremy wasn't really listening. He was, however, looking out the window, still admiring the orchard, when Evan began to talk to him.

"It's nice, isn't it?"

"Yeah... Wait, you mean the orchard right?"

Evan blushed in embarrassment, "Yes! The orchard! Yeah! It's... nice there."

"I wish that we could go back, it looked so... peaceful."

"I know! It is. Maybe that's what I like about it. Oh! And the trees. Can't forget about the trees. There are some very nice trees there."

"Yeah..." Jeremy trailed off awkwardly, wanting to keep the conversation going but not knowing anything about trees. "They were great. 10/10 trees. Very tree like."

Evan laughed softly. "Yep. They're just, beautiful. And so tall too. Good climbing trees." 

"That would be so fun!"

"If my arm wasn't broken..."

Jeremy glanced at the cast, taking in 'CONNOR' written in large letters. Suddenly he realized something. "Wait a minute... I never signed you cast, did I?"

"You really don't need to-"

"No! I should. You're my brother, Evan! Plus, I want to. The only cast I've ever signed was Jake's casts when he broke his legs. And even then, they were mostly covered with Rich's drawings of dicks and stuff by then. Oh god. That was an... interesting time."

"Are you sure?"

"Look, Evan, when we get back, the first thing I'm doing is grabbing a pen and signing your cast. I'm sure everyone else will too."

Evan smiled. "Th-thank you?" He said, not sure how he felt about the situation yet.

Jeremy smiled. That cast was a brief distraction, but he was suddenly back to thinking about the orchard.

Jeremy made a silent vow to himself: He would go back to the orchard someday. And he would climb the tallest tree and run through the fields and watch the sky and take in the view. 

Someday...

He promised.

 

 


	17. Epilogue: All We See is Sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three months after the rest of the story, Evan has a surprise for Jeremy. Oh, also it’s the epilogue, so...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god! Y’all, this is the end! I really, really, really hope you’ve enjoyed it! Let me know what you think! You’re the best!

**Three Months Later:**

"Hey, Dad?" Evan called, grabbing his keys, "Jeremy and I are going out for a little bit! We'll be back before dinner!"

"That's fine, Evan! Have fun!" Mr. Heere called back from the living room.

Evan slid Connor's sweatshirt over his shoulders and pushed open the door, Jeremy not far behind him. 

As Evan started up the car, Jeremy finally asked what was on his mind, "Uh, Evan? Where are we going?"

Evan smiled. "You'll see."

He had been planning this for awhile,  he just hoped that Jeremy would like it...

"Evan, I'm still surprised that you drive," Jeremy commented a few minutes into the drive. Evan chuckled softly. Evan was never the most confident driver... It made him anxious. But breaking his arm made it 10 times worse. He would _never_ drive with a broken arm. But after he had gotten his cast off, he had practiced driving a bit with Mr. Heere. 

His dad. Evan still wasn't the best about calling him dad, but he was getting better at it. When they were practicing driving again, Evan learned that he was actually a pretty nice guy. They were closer after that.

Anyways, he had started driving again when he got his cast off. In fact, the cast was still displayed in his room, covered in the colorful signatures of all of his friends along with Jeremy's old friends. Evan decided that they were pretty nice and he always would say hello to them when they called Jeremy. The first person he had told that he could drive was Connor. He had driven to Connor's house to pick him up for a date, and when Connor saw Evan in the driver's seat, he had started choking on a mouthful of coffee. Evan made sure to tell Connor surprising things when he _wasn't_ drinking coffee after that.

Evan drove down the winding country roads, knowing the way by heart. As the brothers drove along the road, Jeremy's eyes were glued to the scenery in an attempt to figure out where they were going.

Soon enough, Evan was turning onto the bumpy, gravel road of the orchard.

Jeremy gasped and his eyes lit up, a smile spreading across his face. "Evan! The orchard!"

"I knew you didn't want to leave that one time, and I thought that you might like to come again, so..."

"Oh my god! Thank you so much!" Jeremy beamed.

"I thought it might be a good belated birthday present... or something," Evan said quietly. He felt awkward because it was his first time celebrating Jeremy's birthday and he wasn't sure what to do for him. He had never had a brother before! Was he supposed to buy him something or just say 'Happy Birthday' before stealing Jeremy's cake or-

"Evan, I love it. Thank you," Jeremy said, placing a hand on Evan's shoulder and looking him in the eyes. The pair stepped out of the car and Evan took in the view, just like he did when he first came to the orchard with Connor. "Wow," Jeremy breathed.

"C'mon! The view's even better over here!" Evan grinned before leading Jeremy through the maze of trees.

Jeremy's eyes widened as he took in the beauty of the orchard and a grin slowly spread across his face.

Suddenly, the taller boy gasped loudly as the pair burst into the clearing in the center of the orchard. Tucked into a pocket of trees, the clearing was like its own little world. Evan wasn't sure how some people didn't like it. The trees, the leaves, and the clearing itself were all incredible. And now that his cast was off...

Evan set his gaze on the tallest tree and grinned before meeting Jeremy's eyes. His brother smiled back and they took off towards the tree. They raced across the yellow field towards the tallest tree. And then they started to climb.

Higher and higher. 

Until the entire sun shone on his face.

They climbed to the top and just took in the view. Evan's eyes sparkled as he looked out over what seemed like the entire world. It very well could've been the entire world. And the entire sun shone on his face. It was all that mattered in the moment. It was just Evan and the trees and the sun and the world. And Jeremy. His brother.

"Wow," Jeremy breathed. It was all the boy could say. Evan thought it summed up the view pretty well.

If Evan was being honest, he wasn't sure about the other boy at first, but he had come to love him. As a brother. Jeremy was his brother and Evan was Jeremy's brother. It was as simple as that. Evan started laughing, giddy with joy. The world was his, if only for a moment. And then Jeremy started laughing, smiling as much as he could. 

And then they just sat in silence for a few moments. Admiring the view. And then the slowly climbed down, as if not quite sure whether or not they wanted to.

The two walked to the middle of the field, talking and laughing and exchanging jokes. They smiled and laid down right in the center of the field. Evan could see the trees out of the corners of his eyes and feel the sun shining on his face. The grass tickled his arm, which was newly freed from the cast. 

He glanced over at Jeremy who looked him straight in the eye and the pair burst out laughing at nothing in particular. It was just funny how a few months ago he and Jeremy were practically strangers and now they were laying next to each other in the middle of a field.

_Two friends._

_True friends._

They stayed there for hours, just talking and taking in the view. Quoting songs by their favorite bands, telling jokes no one understands except those two. And then they talk.

_Just talk and take in the view._

They talk about anything, from what they'll do when they get out of school to their boyfriends to squip invasions and life and other stuff.

Evan and Jeremy lay there seemingly for forever, watching the world pass by. It seemed like it could never end. Even as the sun began to set, they stayed there watching the clouds.

Evan smiled, taking in the world all at once. The perfect view of the sky and setting sun and rising moon and...

He glanced over to Jeremy, whose eyes were glued to the sky, a grin spreading across his face.

Evan felt himself smiling even more at that as his gaze returned to the sky. 

_All we see is sky_

_For forever..._

 


End file.
